


It Chapter 2

by Geekyglamgirl



Category: IT - Stephen King, IT 2017, it 2019 - Fandom
Genre: 27 Years Later (IT), ALTHOUGH I'D REALLY LIKE HIM TO HAVE ONE, Anyways, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Blood and Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Drinking & Talking, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Everyone is in a relationship but Mike, Explicit Language, F/M, Flashbacks, HE DON'T NEED NO MAN OR WOMAN, He's a strong boi, I can quit whenever, I think that's it - Freeform, I'll tag as I go along, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, MAYBE HE'LL FIND SOMEONE IN FLORIDA IDK, Past Abuse, Past Character Death, Past Child Abuse, Past Sexual Abuse, Past Violence, Physical Abuse, Verbal Abuse, What did you expect tho, back at it again lmao, but that's okay, cuz that still happens a lot, hey demons its ya boi, idk don't judge me, modern songs, thiS DOESN'T DEFINE ME, we'll see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-30
Updated: 2020-02-17
Packaged: 2021-01-13 08:00:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 20
Words: 27,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21240800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geekyglamgirl/pseuds/Geekyglamgirl
Summary: 27 years later, Jane Ripsom is a hit singer in New York who dips into multiple genres of music. She's extremely successful and famous and is happy with her life so far.That is,she is until she gets that damn phone call and the trauma come crashing back





	1. Jane Ripsom Remembers it Al

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!! Sorry I've been dead on this for a while now huh.  
I have no excuses x.x  
But I'm back!  
Shortly, of course but still  
I won't be able to upload toooo much as of now because I have no access to the movie (yEt) and I'm that person who wants to get word-for-word so heh sorry ^.^

Third person POV

Jane yawned, sitting up and stretching out.

Last nights show had been a doozy.

*kinda flashback to last night*

Jane took a deep breath, fiddling with her locket as the music started and the crowd roared. She opened the locket, giving the pictures inside a little kiss (her pre-show good luck charm) and turned, walking onto the stage with a confidence not even Beyoncé could obtain.

“_All my life been hustlin and tonight is my appraisal. Cuz I’m a hooker selling songs and my pimps a record label_.”

Jane strutted out like she was made for the stage, a performance so angelic yet strong people often asked her where her boldness came from. Not many people understood how shy little Jane Ripsom became such a fire onstage.

“_This world is full of demons, stocks and bonds and bible traders. So I do the deed, get up and leave, a climber and a sadist, yeah_.”

The crowd knew every word, they always did. Their caring signs and high pitched screams could be heard and seen from miles around. However, quite oddly, Jane never actually heard them onstage. She was always too focused on the next verse, the next dance move, the anxiety coursing through her veins. But that would eventually flow away, and she’d lose herself in her songs. Jane's songs always meant something, no song was purely for pleasure.

“_Hey look ma I made it! Hey look ma I made it! Everything’s coming up aces, aces. If it’s a dream don’t wake me, don’t wake me. I said hey look ma I made it!_”

*flashback ovaaa*

A bunch of fans had chased her down all the way to a bar afterwards, screaming for autographs and pictures. Then, just when she thought she’d escaped, some drunk douche tried to molest her. Again. She’d managed to wave the bartender over and he shoved the guy out, allowing her to slip through the back door and into the alleyway, silently making her way home. She sighed and sat up, leaving her bed unmade and heading to the kitchen for breakfast. She turned on her Spotify playlist, resuming a song she’d been almost halfway through.

“_If it’s alright, I wanna kick it with you all night, All night Have a good time, ain’t gotta worry cuz it’s all right All right All nighter, all nighter, all night baby Don’t be shy, don’t be shy, don’t be shy baby_”

She sang (All Night by Big Boi) as she pulled out some bananas to make a smoothie. She’d just started slicing them when her phone started ringing.

Jane’s POV

*ring ring*

“Hello, Jane Ripsom speaking, how may I help you?” I asked.

“_Jane? It’s Mike. Mike Hanlon_?”

My eyes widened.

*flashback*

“Alright, well this is it I guess. The last time the Loser’s Club will be together.” I sighed, fiddling with my blanket and looking at all of my friends faces.

“Yeah, I guess it is.” Mike mumbled.

“Let’s not forget each other, yeah? I-I never wanna forget you guys.” I wavered, my voice cracking. To my surprise, Stan stood from across the circle, walking over to me. He sat beside me and wrapped his arm around me, pulling me close. I leaned into his touch, and he rested his head on mine. Usually the roles were reversed, me comforting Stan and Stan leaning in close. Still, this was nice. He rubbed my back soothingly, and, surprising me even further, placed a small kiss on my head. I thought I heard Richie snort beside me, but honestly I couldn’t care less. Stan rarely showed affection, much less initiated it, and I wanted to savor this moment with my best friend.

“We’ll never forget each other. How could we? Especially after everything we’ve been through this summer.” Ben assured us.

“Yeah. A-and we can still c-call each other and wr-write.” Bill agreed. I sniffed and sat up a little straighter, but still leaning into Stan’s touch. Stan ended up staying longer than anyone that day, even Richie. When he did leave he pulled me into another long hug, whispering in my ear.

“_I’ll never forget you Jane. I promise_.”

*flashback over*

“Mike Hanlon no way! How’s that library going huh? That’s what you’re doing back down in Derry right? Or did you finally get fed up with all the hooligans running around switching book covers?” I joked, sitting down on my bed happily.

“_You- you knew I worked at the library_?”

“Well of course I do! I looked you up ages ago, I tried to call but I never got through. Did you ever get any of my letters? You never responded to them.” I rambled, playing with the phone cord.

“_No, I never got them_.”

“That’s a shame. I really tried to keep in touch Mikey ol’ pal I really did.”

“_I believe you Jane_.”

“Well how’s it going down in Derry huh? Still as creepy and old as ever?”

“_That’s, that’s actually what I called to talk to you about_.”

“About Derry being creepy and old? What, did it get extra creepy and old? Ooh! Or maybe oober creepy and old?” I giggled.

“_He’s back Jane_.”

“He? You’re gonna have to be more specific Mike, there are loads of him’s in Maine.”

“_IT, Jane. IT’s back. In Derry_.”

My blood turned cold.

“You’re absolutely sure?”

“_I’m positive Jane. It’s_-“

“27 years later. Dammit!” I shouted, flopping onto my back.

“_Dammit indeed. Do you remember the promise_?”

*flashback*

“_Swear. S-swear, if It isn’t dead, if It ever comes back, we’ll come back too.” Bill said. _

*flashback over*

“Of course I do Mike.”

“_Will you come back_?”

“Yes.”


	2. Don’t die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane gets a call, but her phone isn't ringing

_ ‘ _ ** _Jane_ ** _ ’ _

_ ‘ _ ** _Jane_ ** _ !’ _

_ ‘ _ ** _JANE CAN YOU HEAR ME?_ ** _ ’ _

I shot up in a cold sweat. 

“Hello?” I called out. No response. I must have fallen asleep after my phone call with Mike. I sighed and laid back down. 

_ ‘ _ ** _Jane? C’mon please respond?_ ** _ ’ _

I sat up slowly. 

_ That voice sounds familiar _

“.....Stanley?” I called. Silence. 

_ Hmmm.  _

I closed my eyes and concentrated. 

_ Brown, curly hair. Hazel eyes. Soft, clean, smooth skin. Pristine clothes.  _

_ Stanley? Is that you? Please tell me it’s you.  _

_ ‘ _ ** _Jane! Yes, it’s me! Stanley Uris!_ ** _ ’ _

_ Stan? Well I’ll be, Stan the Man! Jew with a plan! What’s up Stannie why didn’t you just call me? _

_ ‘ _ ** _I...uh...I can’t. Not right now. Listen Jane I gotta tell you something important._ ** _ ’ _

_ What? What is it Stan, you sound scared. _

_ ‘ _ ** _I...I love you Jane._ ** _ ’ _

_ Oh…. _

_ ‘ _ ** _I have ever since I was a kid. You were the only one I trusted, only one I ever went to when I was scared. And you never judged me or made me feel inferior or stupid. You understood. And I just wanted you to know. I love you, I’ll never stop loving you. I’m so sorry Jane._ ** _ ’ _

_ Stan, what are you doing? _

_ ‘ _ ** _....._ ** _ ’ _

_ Stan you would never say anything like this unless it was for a reason. What is the reason? _

_ Stan? _

_ Stan?! _

_ STANLEY!?!?! _

I opened my eyes, tears streaming and a terrible pain in my heart. 

_ Something happened to Stan.  _

I jumped up, bolting for the phone. I picked it up and quickly dialed Stan’s number. 

*ring ring*

*ring ring*

“C’mon Stan pick up.  _ Please. _ ”

_ “I’m sorry, the person you tried to reach was not available. At the ton-“ _

“DAMMIT!” I yelled.

_ “-afterwards you may hang up. Or press one for more options. *beep*.” _

“Stan? It’s-it’s um-it’s Jane just-just  _ please  _ don’t do anything  _ please  _ I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to you-please please  _ please- _ I love you too okay, not like that- but I  _ love  _ you Stan okay just- _ please  _ call me back okay? I love y-“

_ *click* _

“-ou.” I finished, sobbing quietly. 

_ How the fuck did I even do that? _

_ Telepathy isn’t a real thing _

_ …..is it? _

_ Oh God _

_ If it is _

_ Stan, please don’t  _

_ Don’t _

_ Don’t  _

_ Don’t  _

_ Don’t WHAT Jane? He’s smart he’s sensible- _

_ What is he doing? _

_ Don’t  _

_ Don’t _

_ …….don’t die Stanley  _


	3. Highway to Hell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane goes back to Derry

I cried and screamed for three hours straight before passing out from exhaustion. When I woke up my manager was above me, shaking me hard and spritzing water on my face. I shook my head and sat up while my manager bombarded me with questions. I was in my living room, the news on the tv and the room trashed. I didn’t remember trashing the room but given the events of yesterday I wouldn’t put it past myself to ruin my entire house. I shook myself again and forced myself to concentrate on my manager. 

“Jane, were you listening?!”

I shook my head no. “Sorry Linda. Just a little disoriented.”

She sighed. 

“Jane, what happened here?! Were you attacked or hurt?” She asked again. 

“No, no I’m fine. Thank you though.” I stood and headed to my room, ignoring the flies Linda swatted away that clearly came from the banana I’d left the other morning. 

“Are you sure? You were passed out on the floor and you never get drunk so I assume-“

“Well you assumed wrong Linda I’m perfectly fine.” I snapped, pulling out my suitcase. I placed it on my bed and unzipped it. 

“Where are you going?” Linda asked. 

“Maine.” 

“ _ Maine?! _ ”

“Yes. Derry to be exact.”

“Derry? What do you want with that shit-show?” She asked. 

“Nothing to be perfectly honest. But there’s an emergency. I have to go immediately.”

“What about your meetin-“

“Cancel them.”

“ _ Cancel  _ them!?” She shrieked. 

“Like Logan Paul.”

“What about your recording sessions?”

I shrugged. “Derry has a recording studio. Move them there.”

“You can’t be serious.”

“Dead as a doornail.”

I packed a few final things and grabbed my phone, ordering an Uber five minutes away and heading to the door. 

“You can let yourself out Linda! Have a nice day! Tell Rob I said hi!” I shouted as I left the building. The car arrived shortly and I packed my bags with ease. I hopped in, pulling my hoodie on and making sure my sunglasses covered my face correctly. 

“Nearest airport please. I have a flight to catch.” I explained. 

“Oh yeah? Where to? Someplace fun?” The driver asked. 

“Think less Honeymoon Avenue, more Highway to Hell. I’m going to Derry, Maine,” I responded, looking out the window. 

“I’m finally going home.”


	4. Summer Lovin’

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback to three years after Jane had moved out of Derry with Nick

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's right, you heard it. This entire chapter is just one huge flashback. I'm not addicted, I swear.

“Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own?” Nick hollered from inside the car. I turned, gripping my hands together behind my back. 

“Yes!! Have fun in L. A.!” I gave him a smile and waved as we said our goodbyes and he drove off. I waited until his car turned off the street and immediately began to pace and brush my nails against each other. Nervous habit I guess. I peered up at the two story house and gulped, feeling like it was glaring back at me. I paused and imagined it coming to life and swallowing me whole. Then I shook myself, trying to convince myself that there was no way it could do that. I bravely walked up the steps and knocked on the ever-so-familiar door, smiling faintly as I recalled how many times I had done this before. 

“Hello, how can I help you?” Maggie gave a polite smile. I returned it and recited my little response I’d practiced. 

“Hi again! I hope your family has had a wonderful summer so far, I was actually hoping to see your son. Is he here?” I high fived myself mentally. That came out pretty good to me. Maggie smiled and opened the door silently. I thanked her and headed up the stairs, my fingers tracing the pictures on the wall. I slowed as I reached the door, reaching up to knock but hesitating. 

_ Should I really do this? _

I frowned sadly at the door, contemplating it. 

*knock knock* 

_ “I don’t wanna talk to you!” _

I peeked out of my squeezed shut eyes, my heart racing and my mouth growing into a huge smile. 

“Three years I haven’t seen you and  _ that’s  _ how you respond!” I shouted through the door. I heard some scuffling and the door burst open, and I flat out  _ beamed.  _

“Jane?” He croaked out.

“ _ Richie!” _ I squealed. He surged towards me and picked me up, swinging me around his room. I laughed and lifted my feet, aiding his apparently capable muscles, and looked down at a face I had missed oh so much. His eyes were the same, sparkling, brown, and mischievous.

“Jane oh my God, I can’t believe you’re actually here.” He breathed, placing me down gently. He rested his hands on my lower back, and I kept my hands on his chest, for he had grown at least six feet taller in the past three years and was a tower compared to me. 

“Me neither, it’s been so long, you look amazing.” I chuckled. He blushed lightly and shook his head. 

“I’m nothing compared to you Jane. I thought you couldn’t get more gorgeous but...color me impressed.” He looked me up and down, and I did about the same, taking him in. 

“Your hair is curly now, and your face...Bevvie was right you’re really growing into those features.” I smiled. 

“I suppose.” He shrugged. 

“You suppose? Richie you’ve grown everywhere! Your face, your feet, your hands, not to mention the fact that you’re the jolly green giant now.” I giggled. He blushed. 

“Is it bad?” He asked sheepishly. I shook my head no and wrapped my arms around him. 

“It’s perfect.” I promised. His smile faded a bit and I frowned. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked, rubbing his cheek gently with my thumb. 

“Is this why you never responded to my letters?” He questioned quietly. I did a double take. 

“Waaait wait wait wait.  _ I  _ never responded to  _ yours? _ Rich, I must have sent a thousand letters to you, why didn’t  _ you _ respond to  _ those _ ?” 

Richie looked at me blankly. “ _ What? _ ” 

I blinked. 

“Soooo neither of us got each other’s letters?” He asked. I shrugged and shook my head. 

“Well, we can figure out that situation later I suppose.” I decided. Richie nodded in agreement. 

“Soooo,” I flopped backwards onto his bed. “What’s been happening with you lately?” 

Richie sat down beside me and sighed. “Not much really. Same ol same ol. Not like you, hit superstar in New York.” He smiled and punched my leg gently. I giggled and sat up straight. 

“Meh, it’s okay I guess. Not as good as here though. As much as this place sucked, I had thousands of great memories here.” I gripped his bedsheets gently. 

“Really?” Richie asked. I nodded, giggling. 

“Yea of course! New York has a lot of things, but, it doesn’t have you. Or the Losers. Hey, speaking of which, where are the others? Is everyone still here?” I peeked out his window, looking for Eddie or Bill. 

“Ben, Mike, Eddie and Stan. Everyone else left.” He poked at his bedspread. “Soon I will too.”

I whipped my head over to him. “What?? Really?”

He nodded. “I’m glad you came when you did because in two months  _ th-th-that’s all folks! _ ” He chuckled. 

“Oh Richie that’s fantastic!! I’m so excited for you!” I tackled him and hugged him tight as he burst into laughter. 

“Thanks Jane.” He caught his breath and I turned to face him more. 

“Where are you moving?”

“California.”

“What?! That’s…amazing!” I stuttered. His smile faded. 

“And exactly 2,914.1 miles from New York.” He sighed. I raised my eyebrows. 

“You checked?” I asked, my voice cracking a bit. He nodded. 

“Of course I checked. I-“ he paused, eyes widening. My eyes widened too. He recovered quickly, eyes still bugged out.

“-Am, uh, really close to you. Personally, I mean obviously not physically cuz you live in New York and I live here, for now of course but still-“

*flashback*

“-and I didn’t mean to hurt anyone especially you because I’ve kinda had a crush on you since we met and-“

“Wait, what? You had a crush on me?” I gasped. He nodded sheepishly. 

“Yeah I, uh, I don’t know I….damn it!” He yelled. 

“What’s wrong?” I asked. 

“I want to tell you so bad! Ho-how I feel I just, I don’t know it’s like I can’t talk and you  _ know _ its weird when I don’t talk and-“

I walked up to him, grabbed his shirt, pulled him close and-

*flashback over*

“-cuz I mean we’ve always been close ever since we met you were my best friend an-“

I smiled faintly and grabbed his shoulders gently, him still ranting on and on about how close we were and how important our friendship was, and ever so slowly planted my lips on his. The silence was a little overwhelming, and I started to freak out and think I had gotten the wrong idea. I started to pull away but the minute I did he grabbed me and pulled me to him. I squeaked into his mouth, not expecting the fierceness he showed as he kissed me harder than ever before. When we finally parted I gasped for air and he did too, smiling profoundly. 

“Holy fuck.” He croaked and I burst out laughing, and he joined me in it. Both of us fell onto our backs and clutched our sides, it felt like hours passed before we finally finished and silence swept over us again. 

“I wasn’t….sure if we were still….when I got here.” I confessed. 

“Me too.” 

I leaned over to look at him and he did the same. 

“But...we are?”

He smiled and grabbed my hand. 

“I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you princess.”


	5. Empty outside, and inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Before heading to the Chinese restaurant, Jane visits her old home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M REALLY SORRY THIS IS A LONG CHAPTER WITH LONG FLASHBACKS I SWEAR I DIDN'T THINK IT WOULD COME THIS FAR-

I sighed and exited my Uber, staring up at what used to be my house. It was for sale apparently, so I figured it was okay if I walked around inside to see if it had changed at all. On the outside it looked old and gross. The plants that used to invite you in were dead, their carcasses crumbling every once in a while. I shivered and knocked on the door, gripping and twisting my hands in anxiety. The door opened and revealed a sweet looking woman dressed very properly. She smiled excitedly and I felt a pang of guilt as I realized she probably thought I wanted the house. 

“Hi, um, my name is Jane, I used to live here. I was wondering if I could look around? To-uh-reminisce?” I asked timidly. The lady smiled and nodded graciously and I sighed gently. She opened the door wider and I walked in slowly, taking in everything that had once been mine. 

“Take your time, Miss. I’ll be outside if you need me.” She smiled and left without another word. I took a deep breath and walked through the hallway into the living room, glancing at the kitchen on the left. I suppose most people would have tons of memories from their old childhood houses, but I only had one. 

*flashback*

“So, are you excited to move?” Beverly asked as we turned onto my street, our arms linked. 

“O-oh, definitely! Yeah it’s, um, exiting!” I smiled. Beverly frowned. 

“What?” I asked. 

“You’re lying.” She explained. I sputtered. 

“Wha-no-no! No I’m not! I’m totally-um-excited!” I said, faking a smile. Bev raised her eyebrows. I grimaced. 

“Ugh I hate that you know me so well.” I whined. Bevvie grinned and tossed her arm around my shoulder. 

“Sooo tell me how you’re  _ really  _ feeling?” She smirked. I sighed. 

“Well, as much as I hate this place, like don’t get me wrong I HATE Derry…….I’m kinda sad to go.” I confessed.

“Really? Why?” She asked, frowning. 

“Well, for one thing there’s you guys. I don’t wanna leave the Loser’s club. You guys mean too much to me, I love you all so much.” Tears pooled in my eyes. “And Derry is the only place I’ve ever lived. To leave Derry is kinda like leaving my childhood. My home.” I explained. Beverly nodded as we entered my house. 

“I understand….but you forgot one thing.” Beverly added. I frowned, opening the door to my room and sitting down on my bed with Bevvie. 

“What?” I asked. 

Beverly smiled softly. 

“Richie.” She said simply. I sighed yet again and flopped onto my back. 

“Richie, Richie, Richie. He’s a category all on his own. I...I think I love him Beverly. Not like, not a crush, I think I  _ really  _ love him. And we just started dating and-and now I have to say goodbye.” I cried softly. Beverly pulled me up and comforted me, pulling me close and rubbing my back. 

“I know exactly how you feel.” She murmured. I sniffled. 

“Hey, why don’t we have one last ‘hurrah?’” Beverly suggested. I sat up. 

“What do you mean?” I asked. 

“Well you have the house to yourself now right? Let’s have one giant sleepover! We can order pizza, watch movies, and talk.” She explained. I thought about it. 

“Alright, why not? You call everyone, I’ll set everything up.” I said. She nodded and headed to the phone, while I walked downstairs and started pulling out blankets and pillows and placing them on the living room floor. Once I was satisfied with the little nest I had crafted I ran upstairs and poked my head inside my bedroom. 

“Hey Bevvie, can I call Richie? I wanna ask him to bring some stuff.” I asked. Beverly winked and nodded, continuing to talk. I rolled my eyes, smiling and walked downstairs to get some food out. I pulled out some chips and drinks and placed them all out on the counter. 

_ “Jaaaane! I’m done on the phoooone!” _ Beverly yelled. 

“Okay thanks!” I hollered back before picking up the phone and dialing Richie. 

*ring*

*ring*

*ring*

_ Aw c’mon dude now you’re just messing with me _

“ _ Hello? Harold is that you? I’ve just been dyin without you! You took the tractor, the chicken, please come back to the farm Harold? I’m so lonelyyyy!” _

“*sigh* Country widow?” I guessed. 

“ _ Harold it is you! Oh Harold please the crops are a dyin, and my nether regions ar-“ _

“DON'T FINISH THAT SENTENCE RICHIE I SWEAR TO GOD.”

_ “*cackles*” _

“Look I called you for a reason, obviously. Bev and I are gonna have a giant Loser’s Club sleepover tonight at my house. 6:00 pm. Can you come?”

_ “Sure sweetcheeks.” _

“Can you bring some music and movies too?”

_ “You and I could make some real sweet music tonight.” _

“Fuck you okay just bring the movies and music mkay thanks.”

_ “*chuckles* Yowza okay. I’ll see you tonight babe.” _

“See you then Rich.”

_ “Jane?” _

“....yes?”

_ “Fuck this is weird, um, I love you?” _

“Is that a question?”

_ “Fuck if I know. People say that afterwards, right? Y’know, like-“ _

“Oh.”

_ “Yeah.” _

“Um, well I guess so.”

_ “Right.” _

“Um, well, I love you too Rich.”

_ “.....” _

“.....”

_ “Okay see you tonight.” _

“Yup.”

_ “Yeah.” _

I groaned and put the phone down. With a sigh I turned around and saw Bev grimace. 

“That bad huh?” She asked. I moaned. 

“It’s so awkward.” I sighed. She nodded. 

“It probably will be for a while. Maybe take him upstairs when he gets here to talk about it? I’ll distract the ot-“

*knock knock knock*

We looked at the door. 

“Is that-“

*KNOCKKNOCKNOCK*

I walked to the door and opened it to a breathless Richie. 

“Richie? It’s 4:30 you didn’t have to come  _ now _ .” I said, confused. 

“I-I ha-had to t-tell you something, whooo holy shit, remind me to never run again-“ he gasped. 

“You  _ ran?” _

He shrugged. “I  _ really  _ need to talk to you.”

“A-alright um, let's go upstairs, c’mon in.” I said, moving so he could walk in. He waved awkwardly at Beverly and dropped his bag. 

“We- um- we’re just gonna-“ he pointed to the stairs and she nodded. 

“O-okay.” He ran up quickly. I glanced at Beverly and shrugged before running after him. I walked into my room and watched him pace back and forth. 

“Do….you wanna sit down?” I asked tentatively. He nodded and sat quietly. I sat beside him. 

“Okay, can you tell me what’s wrong?” I asked calmly. 

“I can’t do it.” He blurted. I blinked confusedly. 

“Dating. I don’t know how to- fuck I don’t know! It’s so awkward and I don’t know what to do and-“ he rubbed his eyes beneath his glasses furiously and groaned in frustration. 

“Woah woah, hey, it doesn’t have to be awkward.” I assured him, rubbing his back soothingly. 

“Yes it does! Because I’ve never dated a girl before and I don’t wanna fuck up like I always do because things between us have to change an-“

“Hey. Things don’t have to change.” I said. 

“What are you talking about?” He asked, tears slowly leaking out his eyes. I turned to look at him face to face and he did the same. 

“Nothing between us HAS to change. We can still tease each other and flirt and be there for each other, the only difference now is that we  _ know  _ we like each other.” I explained. 

“You’re sure?” He asked. I leaned in and kissed him. This time was much different, it wasn’t rushed or aggressive, it was gentle. Comforting. I pulled away slowly. 

“I’m positive.” I confirmed. He smiled, pulling me closer to him. 

“Can we end every conversation this way?” He asked. I giggled and shifted so I was on his lap. 

“I wouldn’t be opposed to that.” I grinned. He beamed back and leaned up to kiss again. We kissed briefly before I pulled us apart. 

“Alright c’mon. We gotta get the house ready.” I said. 

“Mmmnoooooo!” He whined, burying his head in my chest. I laughed and looked down, petting his head. He nuzzled in deeper and placed kisses to my shoulder. I sighed and laid my head on his, breathing in his warm scent. 

“I never wanna leave this moment.” I admitted softly. He leaned up to look at me. 

“Let’s never leave then. Let’s stay here, forever.” He responded, smiling lightly. I smiled sadly, tears forming in my eyes. He frowned. 

“Hey what’s wrong? Why the sad face?” He asked, cupping my cheek and stroking it with his thumb. I took a deep breath. 

“Tell me not to go.” I said. He frowned. 

“What?” He asked. 

“Tell me not to go to New York. I’ll run away, leave Nick a note-“

“No. No no no baby I can’t do that.” He cut me off, shaking his head. I cried and buried my head in his neck. He held me tightly, rubbing my back soothingly as I sobbed. 

“Jane I like you, so so  _ so  _ much, but I can’t make you stay in this shit-hole. You deserve so much better-“

“But I don’t  _ want  _ better. I want you! I want this, I-“ I cried, my voice cracking. 

“I want you too Jane. God I want you so much. But I- I can’t be the reason you stay here instead of making a future for yourself.” His voice wavered, tears in his eyes too. 

“Just-just promise me,  _ promise  _ that you won’t forget me. Please plea-“ I sniffed. 

“Jane, I will  _ never, ever, EVER  _ forget you. I promise. And I promise I’ll write and call and, and I’ll work Jane! I’ll get a job or- or mow lawns, I’ll make money and come visit you in New York!” He smiled. I chuckled. 

“Promise?” I asked again. 

“Promise.” He confirmed, leaning in so that his forehead was pressed against mine. I sighed, content in this moment. A soft knock came from the other side of the door and we turned to see Beverly open the door.

“Hey, sorry for interrupting, but some of the others are here.” She whispered kindly. I nodded. We spoke briefly in our telepathic bestie language.

_ ‘Everything okay?’ _ her eyes asked.

_ As okay as it will ever be. We are kinda down. But we will get through it.  _ I smiled. She nodded slightly and headed downstairs, most likely to warn the others. Richie sighed.

“I guess we have to go down there, huh?” He mumbled sadly. I pulled his chin up gently and kissed him softly. 

“We don’t have to go immediately.” I whispered.

  
  


Beverly’s POV

  
  


I headed downstairs to Stan and Bill.

“They’ll be down soon, they’re a little…...fragile right now, so don’t be mean.” I warned them. Stan looked a little shocked.

“What’s wrong?! And why would we ever be mean to Jane?” He asked.

“I meant Richie.” I deadpanned.

“W-we won’t Beverly. Are they ok-k-kay?” Bill asked. I sighed.

“They’re both really struggling with Jane moving. I think we all are, but it’s really hitting them hard. Richie is trying to dodge it, I can tell. But I can see the sadness sometimes. When he looks at her. It’s like he’s scared he’s gonna lose her.” I shivered and rubbed my arms. Bill placed his hand on my shoulder comfortingly. 

“They’re s-s-strong. They’ll get through this.” He assured me. I nodded. Stan stood there, staring up at the staircase.

“Well, we can all sit on the couches or something. Wait for them to come down.” I suggested. The boys nodded and headed over, I noticed Stan watching the staircase, not taking his eyes off it.

A few minutes later the two came down, holding hands, both their noses a little red and eyes a little puffy. Jane smiled gently.

“Hey Stannie. Hey Bill. Thanks for coming.” She murmured.

“Of course!” Stan stood quickly but Bill got to her first. Jane let go of Richie’s hand and quickly immersed herself in Bills arms. Bill was like a big brother to Jane, so Richie watched sadly, but happily instead of jealous like he used to. She sniffed into his shoulder, and I saw him whisper something in her ear that made her smile and a few tears left her eyes. Then they separated and she gave him a watery smile before heading over to Stan to hug him too. I noticed how tight Stan gripped her, and how Richie’s expression quickly changed from sad to mad in a snap. He walked over sharply and placed a warning hand on Stan’s arm. Stan looked up and glared back at Richie. Richie squeezed his arm.

“Richie,” I warned. He turned to glance at me and I almost flinched, startled. He looked extremely possessive, almost scary. Jane pulled out of Stans arm’s to glance at me and then Richie, who still glared at me.

“Wha-” She started before the doorbell rang. 

“Um, I’ll get it.” She mumbled, leaving quickly, Bill right behind her.

Janes POV

I left quickly to the door, completely confused by what just happened. But all my worries faded once I opened the door.

“Eddie!” I squealed.

“Janie!” He responded. I pulled him into a heart clenching hug and willed my tears away. Bill walked past us, but I didn’t care. My focus was on Eddie.

“Oh Eddie you have no idea how much I needed to see you.” I mumbled into his shoulder. He had grown a bit since the sewers, filling out his features more. Taller than me already. But I didn’t mind. He was still my baby brother.

“What’s wrong, why are you crying?” He asked worriedly, pulling away. I ushered him out and closed the door.

“I have to leave, Eddie. I have to leave my entire family. How am I supposed to do that? I’m trying to be brave for you and Richie and Bev and Bill and-”

“Jane, you don’t have to be brave for us. We literally fought a killer clown together. We’re brave enough. Let us help you, yeah? We can be there for you if you just let us. Don’t hide things from us anymore, okay?” His chocolate eyes stared into mine, laced with concern. Tears spilled into my eyes and I sobbed. He reached forward and pulled me in, his chin on my head, essentially cradling me like a small child. I buried my head into his chest and cried. It was a while before I finally stopped, pulling back and looking at my best friend. It made my heart clench to see what a young man he had grown to be. Just two years ago he was a tad shorter than me, skinny with some baby fat still, short hair, and big eyes. Now, he was taller, his hair was longer, wavyer. His freckles stood out proudly on his cheeks and his big brown eyes still held the softness of a doe.

“You okay now?” He asked kindly, still gently holding onto me. I smiled and pressed a soft kiss to his cheek, embracing him in a hug just a little longer.

“I love you Eddie. I really do. I’m so proud of you.” I whispered.

“Awww, stop it.” He smiled and I laughed, happy and full.

“Did we miss something?”

Eddie and I turned to see Mike, Ben and Bill heading over. I gasped and ran over excitedly.

“My cinnamon rolls!” I squealed and hugged them both. 

“Our cinnamon baby!” Mike chirped.

“Our Stay Puft Marshmallow!” Ben yelled. I pulled back and glared at him.

“That was ONE time Benjamin. ONE. TIME.” I grumbled. Mike and Ben laughed and Mike kissed me on the forehead.

“But it was a moment we will never forget.” He chuckled as we all headed in. 

_ “FUCK OFF URIS, I SWEAR TO GOD I’LL-” _

_ “TRY ME TOZIER, TOUCH HER AND I WIL-” _

_ “GUYS STOP IT-” _

My eyes widened and I bolted into the living room, the others behind me. Richie and Stan were at each other’s throats and Beverly was trying desperately to pry them off each other.

“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!?!?” I shouted. The three’s heads whipped to me and the boy’s let go of each other.

“Nothing.” The boy’s said, glaring at each other. Beverly panted.

“You. With me. Now Tozier.” Eddie demanded. He and Richie walked outside. I looked at Stan and nodded to the back porch. He followed silently.

“Okay, so, not to be rude, but what the actual fuck got into you two?” I pinched the bridge of my nose.

“Nothing. We just disagreed on something. That’s all.” He mumbled. I sighed and rubbed my forehead.

“Come on Jane it’s nothing new. We disagree all the tim-”

“No, that was not disagreeing. That was fucking cutthroat, Stan. I haven’t seen Richie that upset sinc-” I stopped, my throat closing up.

*flashback inside a flashback*

_ “You’re just a bunch of losers! Fuck off! Your just a bunch of losers and you’re gonna get yourselves killed trying to catch that fucking stupid clown!” _

*flashback over*

“Nevermind. Just, promise me you two assholes will apologize and be friends again?” I asked.

“I make no promises, Ripsom.” He grumbled. I glared at him.

“Fine. I’ll apologize.” He sighed. I smiled and punched his shoulder lightly.

“Thank youuuuu. I kinda need my boyfriend and best friend to be cool with each other ya know?” I joked. He softened and looked sadly at the ground.

“Right. Best friend…” He mumbled.

“What was that?” I asked. His head shot up.

“Nothing.” He smiled and walked inside. I quirked my brow and followed in. Richie and Eddie were still gone. 

“Well, this has been one eventful evening.” I sighed and walked into the kitchen. Stan sighed. 

“W-we’re s-sorry Ja-“ 

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way, just-“ I cut Bill off but also abruptly stopped as an upset looking Richie walked in with an exasperated Eddie. Richie stopped and stood silently until Eddie kicked him in the shin. 

“ _ Jesus, fuc-  _ *sigh* I’m sorry for fighting with you Stanley.” He grumbled. Stan stared. 

“ _ Ahem _ .” I muttered, nodding my head to Richie. Stan dropped his eyes down. 

“I’m sorry too.” He mumbled. I sighed. 

“Ya know tonight was supposed to be fun. So how about we forget whatever... _ that _ was and just have some fun?” I asked. 

“That sounds like a great idea.” Ben agreed. I beamed. 

“Awww thanks cinnamo-“

“If you call me that again I swear I will pull the Stay Puft Marshmallow out faster than you can say stop.” Ben grumbled. I gasped dramatically and the others laughed. 

_ Ah, back to normal _

  
  


*flashback sorta almost basically over*

I smiled, gripping one of the pillows tightly in my arms, tears in my eyes as I remembered that wonderful day. Bits and pieces of our conversations floated through my head as I strolled around, looking at everything from every angle. 

*convo flashback*

_ “Whatever you say, Janie-Lanie-Banie-Baby.” Bill joked. I laughed loudly. _

_ “What’s going on?” Ben asked, clearly confused by our laughter. _

_ “B-Betty had this like-*giggle* phase where she rhymed peoples names and ended it with baby.” I wheezed. Bill fell back in his laughter. _

_ “Th-there was me, Janie-Lanie-Banie-Baby,  _

_ there was Bill, Billy-Gilly-Dilly-Baby, _

_ Richie, Richie-Dichie-Lichie- Baby, and my favorite of course, Eddie-Weddie-Leddie-Spaghetti-Baby!” I laughed.  _

_ “ONLY BECAUSE RICHIE WOULDNT STOP FUCKING CALLING ME THAT.” Eddie screeched. _

_ “Aw cmon Ed’s, you’re my little spaghetti ma-“ _

_ “SHUT THE FUCK UP RICHIE.” _

“ _ Cute, cute, cu-“ _

_ “ _ ** _RICHARD I SWEAR TO GOD-“_ **

##  *convo flashback ovaaa*

I giggled slightly and walked upstairs, passing Nicks old room and pausing at the second door in the hallway. I took a deep breath and shakily opened the door, letting out a small sob when I saw the inside. It was still pink and pretty as ever, her tiny bed sitting there in the middle of the room. It was cleared out of all her things but her essence was still there, her flowery smell lingering in my nose. I missed Betty ever so much, and I quickly left, knowing I couldn’t be there much longer. Instead I walked into my old room and happiness flooded back to me. It too was still pastel pink, the imprints of where my bed and dresser used to be still marked on the floor. My three windows still shone light and warmth in, two facing the street and one facing the house next to us, right next to-

_ The roof _

*flashback...again….sorry….but not as long!*

Richie climbed in the window, skillfully clumsy as ever. I smiled, glad to see him. He pulled a record out of his backpack and walked over to her record player, unusually quiet. 

“Is that a new one?” I asked timidly. He shook his head. 

“Not really. You’ve heard the song, but I just bought the record.” He explained. I nodded and gave a small smile as he set it up. He ignored the smile and started it, walking over to sit by me. I drummed my fingers lightly and he sat directly next to me, pushing his arm out so that Icould wrap mine around it and curl into him. 

“ _ Dreaming of-“ _

“-the day,” I continued, quietly. 

“We used to sit, and watch the waves go by.” Richie finished. 

“I don’t wanna leave for New York ‘Chee.” I murmured softly. He rubbed my arm soothingly. 

“I know babe, I know.” He kissed my head gently as tears slowly leaked down my cheeks. 

“ _ And I don’t know where we’re going, we can never change the way the winds blowing…. _ .”

  
  


(Waves by Calpurnia) 

*flashback over*

  
  


I sniffed sadly, walking downstairs. I felt a little sick and unsure, so I headed out to leave. But I paused as I got to the last step. There was a door, underneath the stairs, and I couldn’t for the life of my remember what it lead to. The queasiness in my stomach roared but I shushed it and opened the door peeking in. It was a basement with one tiny window, light streaking in to the middle of the room, where a little backless chair sat. There were little tools, like small hammers and screwdrivers laying around, and a whip. My blood turned cold as it all came flooding back to me. My wrist suddenly stung with pain and I hollered out, gripping my arm and staring at it, horrified. Dozens of little lines appeared on my wrist, each one slicing into my arm as if there really was a knife sliding against me. I cried out again and looked at the whip and tools angrily, remembering why they laid there, blood stained just like the floor. I ran out of the house and thanked the lady as quickly as possible, running to the Inn as if the devil were chasing me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry, but this is the last I will be posting until I can get my hands on IT chapter two. I have a bunch of little scenes all written out, but not whole chapters. As soon as I am able to I will start posting again. Until then, I hope y'all have good days, weeks, and depending on how long ^that takes months. Love you! <3


	6. Losers Club Official Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers gather together for the first time in 27 years

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey y'all! I'm bacccc what's good! I got IT chapter 2 for christmas so I've been churning out chapters like CRAZY! I'm around halfway through with the movie, so it'll be a while before this whole fic is finished. Then I'll be going bacc to the Umbrella Academy fic soooo let's go!
> 
> Also, suuuper long chapter. Sorry not sorry!

“Um, excuse me?” I said unsurely at the waitress who was bending down behind her stand. 

I was a little tired and from the plane ride and visit endeavor, so I just left my things at the Inn and headed to the Jade of the Orient. 

The waitress popped up and gaped at me.

“Yes, yes hi um I’m meeting some friends here, at a table possibly by the name of Mike Hanlon? Could yo-”

“Are you Jane Ripsom?!?!?!??!” She shrieked. I shushed her politely and nodded. 

“Yes, yes it’s me, would you mind directing me to the Hanlon table please?” I asked. She nodded and grabbed my hand, leading me deep into the restaurant. 

“What’s the craziest thing that’s ever happened at one of your shows?” She questioned excitedly.

“Um, probably during one of my Australian performances, the venue was huge, around seven hundred people. This girl in the back, she was just tryna wave at me but she accidentally hit the fire alarm and so the entire crowd went craz-“ I stopped, a mix of a giggle and a gasp coming out as I laid my eyes on none other than Bill, Mike and Eddie. 

“Oh my God,” I mumbled, my smile growing larger by the second. I turned to the waitress. 

“I’m so sorry, could you excuse me for a minute?” I pleaded. 

“Of course! But, could we take a picture?” She asked, already whipping out her phone. I covered a sigh and forced a smile for her before she skipped away and I faced my friends. Bill didn’t have a specific look to him, but Mike looked desperate and Eddie looked ecstatic. 

“Eddie!” I cried, running into his waiting arms as he laughed and spun me around. 

“Oh my goodness look at you! You’ve grown so much-I remember when you were the same height as me and now- Oh Mike, thank you so much for this!” I squealed, jumping from Eddies arms into Mikes. 

“I know the circumstances aren’t exactly pleasant of course but-oh I missed you all so much-oh Bill,” I whimpered and switched to him, hugging him ever so softly. He was still so gentle, like a reed blowing in the wind, simply swaying to the beat of life. I pulled away and looked at them all, taking in every feature, every detail. 

“I hope you boys don’t mind me saying this, but wow you all look amazing.” I breathed, gazing at them. They blushed and Mike replied with a simple “so do you” that made me positively melt. 

“Oh Mike, so sweet as ever. But I mean it, I mean, damn you all look good.” 

“Jane!” Eddie shrieked, oddly scandalized (though not really odd, seeing as it was Eddie.) 

“What? Don’t tell me Eddie Kaspbrak that you don’t look at yourself in the mirror and think damn I’m hot.” I laughed. Eddie gasped and everyone burst into laughter. However, a gong sound came out of nowhere and I whipped around, squinting in pain, to who I was gonna have to murder for that. 

“This meeting of the Loser’s club has officially begun.”

I had no clue who said it, my focus being on the smiling redhead my eyes had landed on first.

“Heh, look at these guys.” Eddie said awkwardly.

“Bev?!” I shrieked, breaking the tension. She giggled, throwing her arms around me as we excitedly clashed together.

“Jane oh my God look at you!” She squealed.

“Me? Look at you! Hello fashion designer.” I laughed, brushing my hands through her soft curls.

“Well what about you, aren’t you some hip pop star now?” A man appeared beside Bevvie. I beamed.

“Maybe, aren’t you some amazing architect now?” Giggling, I punched his shoulder and hugged him tightly.

“Hi Benny.” 

“Oh dear God I thought we banned that nickname.” He chuckled. I laughed too and trailed off when I saw the last man behind him.

“Richie?” I whispered, my voice cracking. He smiled and nodded, chuckling as I threw myself into his chest and forced myself not to cry.

“Richard Tozier as I live and breathe.” I laughed. He pulled back and grinned at me for what felt like hours.

“Jane Ripsom. Beautiful as ever.” He mumbled. I blushed extremely dark and tried to play it cool.

“Still the biggest flirt in Maine.” I chuckled, punching him lightly too. 

“Only for you baby.” He laughed, winking. Yeah no that blush was gonna stay there, permanently wasn’t it.

“Well let’s sit down and order!” Ben shouted, his energetic energy filling me up and I agreed, bounding over to sit down at the circle table. I sat next to Eddie and Ben, and tried to ignore the empty seat in between Richie and Eddie. 

“So wait, Eddie, you got married?” Richie asked after taking a shot with his hands behind his back.

“Yeah, why’s it so fuckin funny dickwad?”

“What to like, a woman?”

“Fuck you bro.”

“Fuck youuu!” Richie laughed.

“Alright what about you trashmouth you married?” Bill asked, taking a gulp of his drink. Everyone burst into choruses of “as if” and Bev yelled “There’s no way Richie’s married” but he was quick to defend himself. 

“No no, I got married.” He responded. My smile left completely and I downed a shot, doing my best not to flip the table and pout. 

“Richie I don’t believe you.” Bev stated.

“When?” Eddie asked again, having been drowned out in all the noise earlier.

“Did you not hear this?” Richie questioned.

“No.”

“You didn’t know I got married?”

I was now trying desperately to find a ring on any of his fingers.

“No!” Eddie responded.

“Yeah no me and your mom are very very happy right now.“

Everyone burst into laughter and I sighed in relief before chucking egg rolls at him.

“Yeah very happy. He totally fell for it!” Richie wheezed. 

“Fuck you.” Eddie grumbled before taking a long drink from his glass. I chuckled and rubbed his back subconsciously.

“She’s very sweet. Sometimes, she’ll put her arm around me, and she’ll whisper to me, she’ll go ‘Beso gubagta-’” Richie proceeded to do a fantastic Jabba the Hut impression and we all nearly died of laughter, choking on our drinks and food.

“We aaaalll get it. My mom is a great big fat person!” Eddie replied.

“Whaaat-” Richie yelled.

“Hilarious. Hysterical.” Eddie said sarcastically as we all continued to chuckle. Minutes flew by as we drank and ate merrily together. 

“Yeah it’s nice watch. Wait, let’s talk about the elephant not in the room. Ben, what the fuck man?”

“Okay, okay obviously I lost a few pounds-“

“Lost a few pounds?”

“Yeah no shit you lost a few pounds.”

I giggled as Richie and Eddie both commented, running my eyes over Ben. They weren’t wrong, he was definitely slimmer. However what he lacked in weight he had gained in muscle. 

“You’re like.. you’re hot!” Richie said. 

“That’s true.” Eddie agreed. 

“No you’re like every Brazilian soccer player wrapped up into one person. Gorgeous.” Richie continued. 

“They’re not wrong Ben you really are fine. Dude what’s your secret, diet? Workout trainer? I need recommendations.” I joked. 

“Leave him alone. You’re embarrassing him.” Bev said over our giggles, coming to Ben's defense. 

Okay, okay, all right please, come on is Stanley coming or what? Someone save me.” Ben asked. The room grew silent and I felt my heart sink to the floor as everyone looked at the empty chair between Richie and Eddie.

“Stanley,” Eddie murmured.

“Stan, uh. Stan Uris-” 

“Urine.” Bill and Richie said together.

“Stanley Urine, no no he’s a fuckin pussy he’s not gonna show.” Richie laughed. I gritted my teeth, trying to pull myself together.

“Why would Stanley save you anyway?” Eddie asked chuckling. 

“Was  _ I  _ not the one who basically performed surgery on you after Bowers cut you up! Holy shit that’s right!” 

“Yes!” Richie commented. 

“Hey!” I smacked Eddie’s arm. 

“It was a group effort.” I argued. “Totally 50/50.”

“Uh, more like 70/30. We had  _ just  _ started stitching him up when you left with Bev!”

“ _ 70/30?!  _ Excuse you mister-“

“Please tell me you ended up becoming a doctor Ed’s.” Bev interrupted. 

“No, uh I ended up becoming a risk analyst.”

“Oh that sounds really interesting. W-What does that entail?” Richie asked, leaning in. 

“Yeah so I work for like a big insurance firm and-“ he stopped and placed his glass down firmly. I smothered my giggles with my hand as Richie began to lie back in his chair and snore. Everyone burst into laughter as Eddie deadpanned at Richie.

“Fuck you, dude. Fuck you.”

“Was this job invented before fun?”

“Oh that’s so not funny.”

“It is funny.”

Ben guffawed hardest, so Eddie turned to him and yelled “What the fuck are you laughing at?!”

I chuckled harder and patted his back, leaning to his ear. 

“Tell me about it after? Your job? It does sound interesting.”

He smiled back and I leaned into his side, breathing in the familiar smell of us all, together again. 

“I propose a toast, to the losers.” Bev said and I bravely grabbed my wine and clinked it with everyone else. We laughed and chatted and ate, and eventually I forgot about Stan.

The waitress appeared, flashing a smile at me, and handed us plates and a bowl of fortune cookies.

“Oh here we go.” Richie said and I thanked her politely before she left as we all grabbed a cookie. 

“What was that all about?” Richie asked as the waitress exited completely.

“What do you mean?” I asked, placing my cookie down.

“That whole smile thing.” Richie chuckled.

“Oh, um not to boast or brag but apparently she’s a fan... I don’t know, I’m just used to it I guess.” I smiled breathily and quickly busied myself with the table cloth.

“Are you gonna have a cookie?” Richie asked Eddie. 

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t want one.”

“Dude they’re so good. Take it.”

“I don’t know if I can eat this man, there’s so much sugar in it.” Eddie stared at the cookie skeptically. 

“What?” I asked, halfway to grabbing mine. 

“They’re fuckin bad for you. I don’t wanna hurt my type-type two diabetes-“

“I know it’s in your head-“ Richie argued. 

“It’s not in my head-“

“Mmhmm.”

“Did you get it checked? Or have you had any symptoms?” I asked. 

“No, cuz I don’t wanna have to do the needle and the whole process and I don’t know what the symptoms are.” He responded. 

“I think you can research that on Google.” Richie suggested. 

“Symptoms of type two diabetes include increased thirst, frequent urination, hunger, fatigue, and blurred vision. Although in some cases, there may be no symptoms.” I recited. When they both turned to stare at me I shrunk in my seat and picked at the table cloth again. 

“I can’t believe I remember that.” I mumbled. 

“Why  _ do _ you remember it?” Eddie asked. 

“My dad wanted me to be a doctor, remember? He had me studying day after day, I can’t believe it stuck.” I sighed. 

“I mean, its weird right?” Ben said, snapping all of our attention to Bev and Bill who were having a quiet conversation.

“Now that we’re all here, everything’s coming back faster, faster, I mean all of it.” He finished, looking around at all of us.

“Yeah, you know when Mike called me I threw up.” Richie stated. Everyone was gazing at him intently, so I quickly hid my frown of confusion and listened closely.

“Isn’t that weird? Like I got nervous, I got like sick and I threw up.” He explained.

“I feel fine now, I feel very relieved to be here with you guys….” He looked around. 

“Why’s everyone looking at me like this.” He mumbled.

“When Mike called me I crashed my car.” Eddie blurted.

“Seriously?” Bill asked.

“Yeah.”

“Man I hear ya, I mean. My heart was literally pounding right out of my chest.” Ben confessed.

“I thought it was only me.” Bev whispered.

“It was like pure f-f-f-f-f-”

“Fear.” Mike finished Bill’s statement.

*flashback*

It’s head cracked open, particles floating up into the air. 

“Fear.” It said. Then it slipped down completely, swallowed into the dark abyss.

*flashback over*

“It’s fear. What you felt.” Mike explained.

“Why did we all f-f-f-feel like that Mike?” Bill asked. Mike looked down, avoiding his gaze.

“You remember something we don’t, don’t you Mike?” Bill pressed.

“Something happens to you when you leave this town. The farther away the hazier it all gets. But me, I never left. So yeah, I remember. I remember all of it.” He explained.

“Pennywise.” Bev whispered.

“Oh, the fucking clown.” Eddie mumbled. 

“Oh shit.” Ben whimpered.

“Pennywise.” Richie repeated.

“Mike you said you wanted our help with something what was that?” Bill asked gravely.

“There’s an echo here in Derry, that bounces back every twenty seven years-”

“What are you talking about.” Eddie asked.

“Hold on, listen listen-”

“No I don’t wanna-“ Richie interrupted. 

“We thought we stopped it back then. Alright we thought it was done.” Mike began flipping through a journal he brought.

“Mike-“

“A week ago, a man, Adrian Mellan, was slaughtered. A girl, Lisa Albrecht, the other night went missing. There’ve already been others and there  _ will _ be more. More death more pain-”

Everyone began arguing, chattering over each other.

“Guys stop it! Let him finish!” I yelled, already on edge.

“Alright calm down, just, let him explain, let him explain.” Ben added. I gave him a grateful smile.

“That echo? We might have changed it, just like It changed us but we didn’t stop it. Because It just bounced back. We made an oath. That’s why I brought you back that’s why you’re here. To finish it. For good.” Mike explained.

“Well that shit got dark fast.” Richie muttered. “Thanks Mike.”

Eddie began to open his cookie so everyone followed suit, opening them up and reading the fortunes.

Eddie frowned. “My fortune cookie just says ‘could’.”

“They don’t know how to do fortune cookies here. Mine just says ‘guess’.” Richie agreed, showing his around.

“You wanna throw that over here?” Bill asked, collecting fortunes from everyone. He had collected all the boys fortunes and they all scrambled to his side, trying to make heads or tails of the words ‘could, guess, It, cut and not.’

“It’s a message.” Mike decided.

What started as confusion became an all out war. The boys yelled at each other, saying Mike must have trolled them and fucked with the fortune cookies or to calm down and focus or Eddie hollering that he needed his inhaler. Bill looked at Bev and everyone grew quiet. Silently, Bev’s shaking hand placed down her fortune, also bearing a single word.

Or rather, a single name.

  
  


Stanley.


	7. Stanley

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers get their first scare from Pennywise, and find out what happened to Stan

Bill arranged the words into a proper sentence.

_ Guess Stanley could not cut It. _

“Why does it say Stanley.” Eddie asked. “Someone else fucking answer me!?”

The tempura chicken and rice I’d had burned in my throat, threatening its reappearance. I started to open my mouth but then the table rattled, and we all became silent and still, save for a few ‘shit’s’. The fortune cookies still in the bowl were shaking, moving. One hopped out and we all scooched back. A slimy leg broke out of the cookie. I jolted and stood behind my chair, gripping it tightly. 

“What the fuck is that, man? Oh my God ” Richie asked, seemingly exasperated. It completely broke out, a fleshy oozing creature with three legs and wings. 

_ I have to be hallucinating right, we all just ate some really bad Chinese food- _

“Whoa, whoa!” Bill flinched. The creature has grown a baby face and was now crying out. 

“Whoa!” Mike scooched his chair back farther. It zipped toward him, thrashing about. Three more cookies popped out. One was a slimy eyeball with tentacles, sliding it’s way to Richie. 

“Hey! Hey that fortune cookies looking at me! Shit!” He yelled. 

“I don’t wanna be here. I can’t fucking do this. I wanna go home! I don’t wanna be here!” Eddie whimpered as another cookie cracked open in front of him and Ben. The flying baby crawled everywhere, knocking glasses off and screaming. 

“I don’t wanna be here!” Eddie repeated. His cookie cracked more and the bat like wing that had surfaced started flapping. 

“Holy shit!” He yelled. 

“Whoa, hey! God dammit.” Richie hollered as the eyeball scooched closer. The bat wing began to fly and darted to Eddie and Ben, whacking them. 

“Hey, Eddie!” Richie shouted. Tears brimmed my eyes. This was too much, too fast. Sizzling black liquid seeped out of the bowl and onto the table, burning things in its wake. Another cookie opened and a bloody baby bird popped out, crawling away and crying sadly. The bat wing moved on to Bill and sliced at him too. I backed up against the fish tank in the wall next to Mike, panicked. He yelled, backing up quickly. Bill and I looked at the tank and quickly followed his footsteps. For in the tank were bloody, mangled heads, singing a creepy song. 

“Whoa, fuck!” Bill screamed. 

“It’s not real! It’s not real!!!” Mike shouted. He grabbed a chair, still screaming ‘this isn’t real, it’s not real’ and threw it on the table over and over, trying to hit that baby creature. I screamed, crumpling to the floor. 

_ I wish Stannie were here _

“Is everything alright?”

I looked up at the voice. It was the waitress. Everything disappeared, the heads the creatures, all of it. 

“Yeah, Yeah. Could we get the check?” Richie asked. 

“Th-that’s what Pennywise does, right? He fucks with us. So Stanley’s probably fine.” Eddie rambled as we headed out. I opened my mouth to object but Beverly interrupted, asking Mike for Stan’s phone number. I sighed and kept quiet. 

“Hey, you okay?” Richie asked, nudging me gently. 

“You mean besides what shit just went down?” I responded. 

“Hey Richie.”

We turned slowly. A kid walked up to us slowly too. 

“How’d you, uh. How’d you know my name?” He questioned. 

“The fun’s just beginning, right?” The kid smiled. 

A beat or two passed by. Total silence. 

“What he said, is it..?” Eddie asked before quickly hiding behind us all. 

“Listen, you think this is funny? All right? You think this is some sort of game, huh? Well fuck you! All right?” Richie yelled, shaking the kids arm. 

“Rich be careful dude.” Bill warned. 

“FUCK YOU! I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU!” Richie screamed. 

“The fun’s just beginning. The line from your act dude. I’m a fan.” The kid responded. Richie dropped his arm as I sighed. 

“Are those your parents?” Rich asked as a family walked to us. 

“Yeah.” 

“You want a picture?” Richie smiled. I face palmed. 

“You okay Dean? The father asked, taking his hand. 

“I think I’m good.” The kid stared at Richie judgmentally and started to walk away. 

“Okay, cool. He’s a good kid.” Richie mumbled awkwardly. 

“I am so so sorry folks. Hi, Dean is it?” I put on my award winning smile and offered my hand. 

“Yeah.” He shook it cautiously. 

“See that,” I paused pointing at Richie. 

“Is actually a sneak peak at one of his new shows! How lucky are you right? I see you have a cute little sister there, hi sweetie how are you?” I smiled at the girl. She blushed and gave a small wave. I waved back. 

“Does she listen to my music?” I asked. 

“Every day.” Dean chuckled. 

“Well how would your family like some front row tickets to one of my shows huh? On the house.” I explained to his parents. 

“Really?” He asked. 

“For sure lil bro! I just need to get your parents phone number so I can send it to them.” I quickly got his fathers information and gave him and his sister a high five. 

“Alright bye now! Safe travels!” I flashed another smiled and waved as we all walked away. 

“What was that?” Richie asked. 

“Me saving you dumbass did you really not remember your own joke?” I scoffed. 

“Jesus Richie. You don’t remember a line from your own show?” Ben asked. 

“I don’t write my own material.” Rich muttered. 

“I fucking knew it! I fucking knew it!” Eddie shouted. 

“Shush guys I’m gonna call Stan.” Bev hushed. 

“Actually about that-“ I started. 

“Can we talk afterwards?” Mike asked me, heading over to Bev. I growled in my throat and remained silent. 

“Hello, uh Mrs. Uris. My name’s Beverly Marsh. I apologize for calling but I’m an old friend of your husband‘s.” Beverly spoke into the speakerphone. 

“You lied to us, and that’s not okay.” Eddie said to Mike. 

_ Well I guess we’re throwing out the don’t talk while bevvies on the phone rule _

“Yeah, first words out of your mouth should have been like, ‘Hey man you want to come to Derry and get murdered?’ Cuz then I would have said  _ no _ .” Richie added. 

“Guys,” Ben whispered, judgement on his face. 

“Fucking entrapment, man.” Richie mutterted. 

_ “Oh.*sniff* He passed.”  _ Mrs. Uris tearful voice spoke. That Chinese food in my stomach roared even harder. 

“When did it happen?” Bev asked. 

“ _ Yesterday _ . _ It was horrible, the way he died. His wrists.” _

“ ** _In the bathtub.”_ ** She and Beverly said at once. Tears stung my eyes and I dropped to the floor, sobbing quietly. Ben quickly slid in beside me, consoling me as Bill patted my shoulder comforting me. 

“ _ I’m sorry I-I have to go.” _

“W-we’re all very sorry, Patty.” 

_ “Thank you.”  _ Mrs. Uris hung up. 

I stood up and ran to a nearby tree, puking my guts out. 

“Stanley.” Eddie states aggressively. Beverly shakingly lit a cig.

“Pennywise knew. He knew before we did.” Eddie continued. 

“I knew too.” I mumbled. They all finally turned to me. 

“What?” Eddie yelled. 

“I’ve been trying to tell you! But every time I tried the topic changed or kids walked up or fucking fortune cookies exploded.” I grumbled. 

“Jane, what happened.” Mike asked quietly.

“It was after you called me. I’d fallen asleep but, I woke up when I heard someone yelling my name. But...there wasn’t anyone there. I kept hearing the voice though, and eventually I responded to it, stupid as it sounds. But it was him, it was Stanley. He said-” My voice wavered and I took a deep breath, forcing myself not to cry again. 

“He said he loved me, and he was sorry, and then he just- stopped responding. I tried to call him but he wouldn’t pick up-” a small sob escaped me as I recalled the events, Stan's voice still ringing in my ears.

“I sat there screaming his name for three hours before I passed out. I knew he was gone. I could feel it inside,” I placed my hands on my chest, remembering the pain. “I passed out eventually.” 

“We have to stop him. Pennywise. I have a plan-“ Mike started. 

“I have a plan. Getting the fuck out of dodge before this ends worse than one of Bill’s books. Who’s with me?” Richie asked, raising his hand. Eddie raised his hand too. 

“We made a promise to each other.” Mike argued. 

“Let’s un- let’s un-make the promise.” Richie tried. 

“Richie other people are gonna die.” Ben stated. 

“He’s right we have to do this. We have to save them.” I added. 

“Other people die every day man! We don’t owe this town shit! Plus I just remembered I grew up here like two hours ago. So I’m fucking leaving. Fuck this.” He yelled, heading to his car. 

“Really? That’s your excuse?” I shouted after him. 

“It’s not a fucking excuse it’s a fact Jane! Real world!” He turned to face me. 

“Oh my God you haven’t grown up a damn bit have you? You’re still the scared, selfish asshole you always have been and always fucking will be. Why don’t you try thinking about people other than yourself for a change huh Rich? People die every day but their deaths are not permission for you to run away and hide from responsibility. We took an oath. There’s no running away this time ‘Chee.” I lectured. 

“Fucking watch me.” He spat and headed to his car. 

“I’m sorry man, I’m with Richie.” Eddie mumbled as he followed. 

“Ed’s please-“ Mike hurried after them. 

“Listen. What we stay, we die, that’s it? I’m gonna go back to the Inn, I’m gonna pack up all my shit, and I’m gonna drive to my home. I’m sorry man. Good luck.” He ran to his car. 

“No, Eddie. Please. Please, Eddie! Eddie wait!” Mike shouted as he and Richie headed off. 

“I’m gonna head back to the town house too, are you coming?”

“Yeah.”

I turned with Mike to see Bev and Ben heading off too. 

“Wha- are you fucking serious right now? You guys are leaving too? What the fuck.” I said exasperated. 

“You should have told us Mikey.” Ben said over his shoulder. 

Mike turned to solemn Bill, standing a few feet away. 

“Bill, please man. I’m begging you please just listen to me man please.” Mike whimpered. 

“What are you gonna say? What could you possibly say that would make any kind of a difference? They’re all gone.” He spoke softly. 

*flashback*

_ Bill grabbed his bike. I nodded and lept onto the back.  _

_ “Jane! What are you doing?!” Eddie asked. I turned.  _

_ “There’s a chance that Georgie’s in there. Bill has a chance to find his brother. Do you know what I would give? For a chance to have Betty back? I would give up my fucking life. Just to see her go to college. So I’m going with Bill.” I turned, grabbing Bills waist.  _

_ “Go Bill.” _

*flashback over* 

“Maybe. But we’re not gone. Maybe that’s all we need. You and I once headed to Neibolt alone. You believed we could at least try then. Now we have Mike. Why not try now?” I asked. 

“Come on. Let me show you something.” Mike pleaded. “One thing. And if you wanna leave you- you can leave. Just let me show you this first, please.”

My phone buzzed in my pocket. I quickly whipped it out, hoping it was one of the Losers. 

_ Recording session tonight at the recording studio (did you know there’s only ONE in that whole town??) by the theater. Leave. NOW Jane.  _

_ ~Linda _

I sighed.  _ No rest for the weary I suppose.  _

“Well, you guys have fun with that. I’ve got some ...things I need to do before we go after Pennywise.” I told them. 

“P-promise you won't leave.” Mike asked. 

“Of course I won’t Mike. I’m here till the end.”


	8. Losers Stick Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane takes some time to remember her last visit to Derry, and decides the Losers can't leave this time.

I huffed as I walked in the empty studio.  _ She really couldn’t find me any help? Oh well.  _

I began flipping switches and pressing buttons, bringing the old gal back to life. The lights turned on and I breathed in the familiar scent of equipment. I set up the equipment as quickly as possible and stepped into the small room, up to the solemn microphone. 

*flashback*

##  *Summer of ‘92, when Jane visited Derry again*

Three years after I moved to New York, and yet it felt as if nothing had changed at all. Richie and I spent the first week avoiding the Losers, wanting to have some alone time to catch up and assess our relationship status. Although we avoided saying the words ‘boyfriend, girlfriend, dating,’ and anything stronger than ‘like’ or ‘really care’, we made sure it was apparent that we were all of those things by our actions. Richie would sneak his hoodies and shirts into my bag, I would cook breakfast for him every morning, things like that. One time he snuck a pair of his boxers into my bag, just for chucks, and waited to see my reaction. Boy was he surprised when I joined him downstairs to cuddle wearing the boxers proudly. He blushed and was extremely careful about how close we snuggled that night. I know it was probably too much, but Richie and I had always teased, pranked, and challenged each other growing up and I wasn’t about to stop now. We were both determined to reach the alpha status, which made it hard when Richie would easily push me against a wall and kiss me harshly before walking away like it was nothing….all while everyone in the road watched. PDA had never been my style, but who was I to back down? So I’d usually reciprocate by calling Richie a sugared-up cutesy name, or asking a store worker ‘doesn’t he look so good in this? God I could just melt’. That always got him blushing.

“Hey ‘Chee, I think it’s time we visit the Losers.” I stated as I slid a pan of cookie dough into the oven.

“Oh thank God. On one hand it’s been fucking amazing just us two, but I’m sick of telling the guys that I’m suffering from projectile vomiting or a shitty case of diarrhea.” he sighed. I repressed my gag and nodded.

“How about we do it tonight? They’ll probably be in the Barrens at the clubhouse so we can just pop in.” he suggested.

“That’ll work. Should I save some of these cookies for them?”

“Probably. You know Eddie’ll kill both of us for not telling them but not even that little demon can resist those chocolatey chunks.”

“Don’t talk about Mike like that.”

Richie choked on his water.

  
  


“WHAT. THE. FUCK.” Eddie screeched. I smiled slightly and did some jazz hands.

“Ta daaaaaa.” I mumbled. Eddie and Stan looked like they were both trying to mentally squeeze my brain into destruction.

“How long have you been here?!” Ben exclaimed, hugging me tightly. 

“Only a week.” I giggled.

“ ** _A WEEK?!”_ ** Stan and Eddie screamed. 

“Surprise?” I whimpered. Richie hopped in front of me. 

“GET BACK DEMON.” He yelled, throwing the bag of chocolate chip cookies at Eddie and putting a cross up with his fingers. 

“Fuck you dude.” He muttered, plucking the bag off the ground and chewing the contents inside. 

“Why didn’t you tell us you were here?” Stan asked quietly. I peeked out from behind Richie. 

“We just had to work some stuff out Stannie. That’s all.” I smiled, grabbing his hands. “Hi.” 

“Hi.” He smiled back. 

“You look taller. More confident.” I decided. 

“Thanks.” he blushed. 

“You all look grown up compared to the babies you were three years ago. Especially you Ed’s what happened?” I giggled, bouncing over to the scowling boy. 

“I’m just as man as I was three years ago Jane.” He grumbled. 

“Awww don’t be mad at me baby! I meant it in a good way. Although you still have that adorable charm.” I hugged him. He gave in and hugged me back. 

“How long are you here for?” Mike asked. 

“Well when I got here it was a month, so now it’s around three weeks.” I stated.

“Only three weeks?” Eddie whined.

“I’m sorry. But I have to get back to New York sometime. I..kinda have, ya know a-job..thing..” I fiddled with my fingers.

“That’s right! You’re a big time celebrity now.” Mike smiled. I fiddled with my fingers harder.

“Not at all. I’m just a regular girl, noooo biggie.” I chuckled.

“She’s been stopped thirty two times since she’s been here.” Richie shouted from the hammock.

“You’re not helping!” I yelled back, glaring at him. He gave me a cheesy smile.

“Oh shit that reminds me! I actually have to go record a song at the studio….do you guys wanna come?” I asked sheepishly. The response was unanimous.

“ **YES!!”**

“Well this is it! My home sweet home.” I smiled giddily, walking into the space. I waved shyly at the workers.

“Um, so I go in there and sing basically and they, plus you, stay out here and record, edit, and basically fix all my flaws afterwards. So….bye.” I waved and giggled awkwardly as I walked into the small room. I took a deep breath, entering the little world I saved specifically for singing. I blocked everything out, placing the headphones on my head, left ear out, right ear covered, and nodded to the workers.

_ I’m ready. _

_ “This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ I never meant to leave you hurtin' _

_ I never meant to do the worst thing _

_ Not to you  _

_ 'Cause every time I read your message _

_ I wish I wasn't one of your exes _

_ Now I'm the fool  _

_ Since you been gone _

_ I've been dancing on my own _

_ There's boys up in my zone _

_ But they can't turn me on _

_ 'Cause baby, you're the only one I'm coming for _

_ I can't take no more, no more, no more _

_ I wanna f-woop, woop woop, but I'm broken hearted _

_ Cr-cr-cry but I like to party _

_ T-t-touch but I got nobody _

_ Here on my own _

_ I wanna f-woop, woop woop, but I'm broken hearted _

_ Cr-cr-cry since the day we parted _

_ T-t-touch but I got nobody _

_ So I do it solo _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ So I do it solo _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ I do it solo _

_ Every single night I lose it _

_ I can't even hear the music without you (it solo, solo, everybody) _

_ Ah, yeah, yeah _

_ Try to stop myself from calling _

_ But I really wanna know if you're with someone new (it solo, solo, everybody) _

_ Since you been gone _

_ I've been dancing on my own _

_ There's boys up in my zone _

_ But they can't turn me on _

_ 'Cause baby, you're the only one I'm coming for _

_ I can't take no more, no more, no more _

_ I wanna f-woop, woop woop, but I'm broken hearted _

_ Cr-cr-cry but I like to party _

_ T-t-touch but I got nobody _

_ Here on my own _

_ I wanna f-woop, woop woop, but I'm broken hearted _

_ Cr-cr-cry since the day we parted _

_ T-t-touch but I got nobody _

_ So I do it solo _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ I do it solo _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ So do it solo _

_ Can't do it solo _

_ I wanna f-woop, woop woop, but I'm broken hearted _

_ Cr-cr-cry but I like to party _

_ T-t-touch but I got nobody _

_ Here on my own (here on my own) _

_ I wanna f-woop, woop woop, but I'm broken hearted _

_ Cr-cr-cry since the day we parted _

_ T-t-touch but I got nobody _

_ So I do it solo _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ I do it solo _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ This solo, everybody _

_ This solo, solo, everybody _

_ I do it solo _

_ So I do it solo.” _

*flashback over*

  
  


Richie and I had made  ** _hard _ ** eye contact during that moment. It felt….different than I’d ever felt. I shook myself.

_ Forget that. Forget him. Focus.  _

I took a deep breath and walked up to the mic.

_ How do I do this? I need something deep, personal. But what? What? _

I let myself drift through the past two hours. The only thing that stood out was how disappointed I’d been when Richie left like he always did. I channeled that passion into my chest, and let it flow.

_ “No, I think I'll stay in tonight _

_ Skip the conversations and the "Oh, I'm fines" _

_ No, I'm no stranger to surprise _

_ This paper town has let me down too many times _

_ Why do I even try? Give me a reason why _

_ I thought that I could trust you, never mind _

_ Why all the switching sides? Where do I draw the line? _

_ I guess I'm too naive to read the signs _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ All they ever do is let me down _

_ Every time I let somebody in _

_ Then I find out what they're all about _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ Wonder where they're all hidin' out _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ Gotta get up out of this town _

_ Oh, oh _

_ Oh, ah _

_ I stay up, talkin' to the moon _

_ Been feelin' so alone in every crowded room _

_ Can't help but feel like something's wrong, yeah _

_ 'Cause the place I'm livin' in just doesn't feel like home _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ All they ever do is let me down _

_ Every time I let somebody in _

_ Then I find out what they're all about _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ Wonder where they're all hidin' out _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ Gotta get up out of this town _

_ Lookin' for some new friends _

_ Oh, oh _

_ Oh, ah _

_ I just wanna talk about nothin' _

_ With somebody that means somethin' _

_ Spell the names of all our dreams and demons _

_ For the times that I don't understand _

_ Tell me what's the point of a moon like this _

_ When I'm alone again _

_ Can I run away to somewhere beautiful _

_ Where nobody knows my name? _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ All they ever do is let me down _

_ And I let somebody in _

_ But I find out what they're all about _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ All they ever do is let me down _

_ I'm just lookin' for some real friends _

_ Gotta get up out of this town, yeah _

_ Oh, oh _

_ Oh, ah.” _

I sighed and left the room. Pressing the stop button on the recording machine.

_ They are NOT leaving this time. No splitting up. _

  
  
  


“ _ Eduardo! Andale let’s go _ !”

I burst into the Inn and assessed my surroundings. Richie was at the foot of the stairs and Bev and Ben were at the little bar on the left. 

“No  _ Eduardo  _ there will be no  _ andale _ -ing. You guys can’t just leave again this time.” I yelled. 

“Seriously Jane this is getting old.” Richie argued. 

“There’s something you’re not telling us. You knew how Stanley died you knew.” Ben’s soft voice floated through. Richie and I turned and walked to them. 

“Wait what?” Richie asked. 

“He’s joking right? Bev you-you didn’t know. How could you know? Right? No no she didn’t know she would have told someone, right Bev?” My hands shook as I rambled, my eyes searching hers. 

“I can’t do this.” She whispered, leaving to the adjacent room. 

“She knew how Stanley was gonna die, is that what she just said?” Richie questioned as Ben ran after her. We followed them both to the front lobby. 

“You can’t just walk away from this.” Ben told her as she hit the bell on the main desk. 

“How did you know where he killed himself?” Ben asked. She ignored him and went around to the back of the desk to find her key. 

“Bev,” he tried again. “Talk to me. Just talk to me. Like we used to. Come on, how did you know?” He pleaded, stepping in front of her as she tried to leave. 

“Because I saw it.” She finally uttered. “I’ve seen all of us die.”

“Wait...what?” I asked, blood boiling in my veins. Eddie’s bags thumped against the stairs behind us faintly. 

“Okay, I just gotta grab my toiletry bag and then we can go.” He said, pausing when he saw us. 

“What’d I miss?”

“You knew?” I whimpered, my nails digging into my palms. “All this time and you  _ knew?” _ My voice grew loud and I lunged at her. Richie grabbed my middle and hurled me away. 

“Jane-“ Bev shook in Ben's arms, trying to explain herself. 

“No I don’t wanna fucking hear it! You knew! You  _ knew  _ Stanley was gonna die so why? Why didn’t you stop it? Why didn’t you help him? We could have saved him damn it!” I screamed, thrashing in Richie’s arms as he pulled me outside. 

“Jane, Jane, Jane whoa calm down-“

“No! No Richie I’m not gonna just fucking calm down our  _ best friend died and she could have fucking saved him! _ ” I screeched, stamping my foot and clutching my head. 

“I heard him Rich, I heard his last thoughts! Heard him saying he loved me Rich he-I-“ I groaned, unable to finish my thoughts. 

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s-its gonna be okay.” Richie pulled me to him and hugged me tight. 

“I-I can’t leave Derry because I don’t want him to have died for nothing.” I gasped, trying to keep my tears down. “I can’t keep watching my loved ones die, I mean c’mon Rich aren’t you tired too?” I asked, pulling back to look in his eyes. 

“There was once a time when you helped us defeat It. What happened to that?”

“I was thirteen Jane. Bev had been captured I-“

“So that’s what it takes? It has to be one of us for you to finally grow some balls and fight?” I growled. I pushed myself out of his arms and walked away as a light rain started to sprinkle. 

“Jane-“

“No.”

“Jane cmon-“

“ _ No-“ _

“Jane would you stop fucking walking and just talk to me!” Richie groaned. 

“ ** _No!_ ** I don’t want to talk to you Richie!” I yelled. He grabbed my shoulder and pushed me into the wall. 

“Jane, we aren’t fucking thirteen anymore. We’re adults. You can’t just leave and ignore me.” He said, his hands pinning mine above my head. I struggled in his grasp. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?! Let me go!!” I screeched, trying desperately to get out of his grip. 

“No. I know you, Jane. I know we need to talk about this. I’m not letting you go until we fix this.” He panted, clearly struggling on keeping me down. 

“You don’t know me you shit liar.” I growled. 

“You’re favorite color is pastel pink. You love the smell of strawberries, but don’t actually like the fruit. You sleep with the room extremely cold so you can bundle under blankets, and cover yourself completely except for your head. You like milkshakes and chocolate, but not chocolate milkshakes. Your sister died by a demonic clown and you still think it’s your fault even though it isn’t, you tell everyone you’re favorite band is the foo fighters so people don’t think you’re basic because you’re actual favorite band is Queen and you think Radio Ga Ga was an extremely underrated song and you cry every time you listen to it.” Richie rambled. My eyes widened, I couldn’t believe he remembered all of that. 

“I  _ know  _ you, Jane Ripsom. So please,  _ please  _ tell me what I did wrong.” He blinked, rain getting in his eyes but refusing to wipe it. 

“You’re not...you.” I whispered. 

“What?” He frowned. I shook my head, tears welling in my eyes. 

“You’re not the boy I fell in love with.” I explained. His hands slowly slid down, and I grasped his face gently. 

“The Richie I know would never leave. He wouldn’t just let everyone die, he would pick up that bat and fight with us, fight to  _ save  _ us.” I told him, grabbing his hand. He looked to the ground, water dripping off his head. 

“Richie,” I mumbled, lifting his face until I saw his eyes, and all the fear welled up in them. 

“Oh, ’Chee.” I whispered, and leaned on my tippy toes to hug him. 

“I know it’s hard. It’s real life and it’s scary, but  _ please  _ don’t leave me alone like Stan did.” I mumbled. 

“Did you love him?” He asked. I pulled back, confused. 

“I love all of you.” I stated. 

“No, did you  _ love  _ him?” He asked, brown eyes boring into mine. 

“...No.” I responded. 

“Hey guys! Come back! We need to talk this out!” Eddie yelled from the Inn. 

“Can you do it?” Richie asked, nodding to the Inn. I nodded back. 

“Yes. But the real question is can you?”


	9. Time to Remember

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers have a much needed discussion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> srry, short chapter <3

We all gathered in the bar room, Ben poured himself a drink while Richie and I moved to the opposite side of Bev. I crossed my arms, still pissed. 

“Okay, so what do you mean that you’ve seen us all die?” Eddie asked, pacing the floor. 

“Yeah, cuz I gotta be honest that’s a fucked up thing to just drop on somebody.” Richie added. 

“Especially when it’s a secret you’ve been hiding from your best friends.” I grumbled. Bev wiped away a tear, and for a moment I felt bad. But then I remembered Stan and my flip switched again. 

“Every night since Derry, I-...I’ve been having these nightmares. People in pain. People dying. People-“ her chest heaved as she tried to stop crying. 

“So you have nightmares. I have nightmares. People, they have nightmares. But, that doesn’t mean that your visions are true.” Eddie tried. 

“I’ve watched every single one of us…” Bev choked up. 

“You’ve seen every single one of us what?” Bill asked, walking into the room and sitting down by Bev. My arms dropped and I had to grip the ends of my jacket to stop myself from running to him. 

“At the place that Stan wound up. That’s how we end.” Bev finished. 

“Okay, how come the rest of us aren’t seeing that shit? I mean what makes her so different?” Richie questioned aggressively. 

“The Deadlights.” Mike answered. 

*flashback*

  
  


_ She was pale, and her eyes were clouded. Her face unfocused. She was catatonic. _

*flashback over*

“The Deadlights.” Bill repeated. “She was the only one of us that got c-c-caught in the Deadlights that day.”

“We were all touched by It.” Mike spoke. “Changed. Deep down, like an infection or a virus. A virus. You understand. Slowly growing. That virus, it’s been growing for twenty seven years. This whole time, metastasizing. It just got to Stan first, because-“

“Stan was the weakest.” Richie finished. I stomped on his foot. 

“Jesus Christ Rich.” Bill sighed. 

“Ow! Just saying what everyone else was thinking man.” He responded. 

“I mean Rich, c’mon.” Eddie chastised. 

“What Beverly sees, it  _ will  _ come to pass. It’s what’ll happen to all of us, eventually. Unless we stop it.” Mike continued. 

“How the hell are we supposed to do that?” Eddie asked. 

“Million dollar question folks.” I mumbled. 

“The Ritual of Chud.” Mike stated. 

“I’m sorry what?” I asked. 

“The Shokopiwah.” Mike said, ignoring my question. 

“Gazuntite.” I added. 

“The first ones who fought It, they have a saying. ‘All living things must abide by the laws of the shape they inhabit’-“

“A tribal ritual? Are fucking kidding me man?” Richie blurted. “Alright there’s gotta be another way. Okay? This thing comes back what every twenty seven years? Let’s just kick the can down the road and do it then.” He decided. 

“And let all the innocent children die.” I argued sarcastically. 

“Wait we’ll be seventy years old asshole.” Eddie concluded. 

“It doesn’t work that way.” Bev stated. Bill walked over by her side again, hugging her slightly. “ _ None _ of us make it another twenty years, an- and the way it happens…” Bev shook her head remorsefully as Richie downed a shot. I grabbed one too, needing a boost from the night's events.

“So, if we don’t beat It this cycle, then..” Ben trailed. 

“We die.” Bill stated. 

“Horribly.” Eddie added. 

“Yeah I don’t need the ‘horribly’ part.” Richie responded. 

“It is kind of insinuated.” I agreed. 

“I didn’t say it. She said it. Not me.”

“Well yeah Ed’s but you didn’t have to reiterate it.” I argued. 

“Alright, guys look I’ve seen w-w-what he’s talking about, and, it’s all true.” Bill interrupted. “It’s the only way. If we want this ritual to work-“

“We have to remember.” Mike finished. 

“Remember what?” Richie asked. 


	10. The Clubhouse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers visit the past, and Jane learns something life-altering

“It’s better if I show you,” Mike explained as we headed down the streets of Derry, the sun just starting to get up. “We don’t have much time. His cycle will end soon. And once it does..”

“We’re fucked.” Eddie finished. Mike led us down, into a grassy plain and under the train bridge. Past a river, where Richie and I teased Eddie for rolling his pants up and holding his shoes as we crossed ‘ _ do you know how many germs are in rivers’  _ and finally stopped in the middle of a forest. 

“The Barrens.” Bev remembered. 

“This is where we came.” Ben smiled. “After the rock fight.”

“Rock  _ war,  _ if I’m correct.” I chuckled. 

“The Clubhouse!” Richie recalled. 

“You built that for us.” Bev chuckled, pointing to Ben. 

“Yeah, yeah the hatch has got to be around here someplace.” Richie said, searching for it. 

“You did. I do remember that!” Eddie shouted gleefully. I grabbed his hand and pulled him along, kicking at the sticks and leaves to find the hatch. 

“You know what? I actually think it the door was more like-“ Ben paused where he was and stomped. “Around-“ the floor underneath him gave way and he fell through a hole. 

“Found it.” His voice rang through. 

“I’m okay! Come down!” He shouted. 

“Are you sure?!” I yelled back as we headed over. 

“Positive!”

*flashback*

  
  


“What the dick is this?” Richie asked as he jumped off the ladder.

“I don’t know but hurry up! I wanna see too!” I whined as Bill climbed in after him.

“How’d you build it?” He asked Ben, completely ignoring me. I shifted impatiently for Bill to finish getting in.

“ _ When  _ did you build it?” Bill added.

“Here and there, I guess. It was already dug out from something so I just had to reinforce the walls and get some wood for the-for the roof door and that’s pretty much it. Pretty good for my first time, huh?“ Ben explained, slapping his hand onto one of the pillars and causing a few of the wooden boards on top to fall. I flinched at the crash and Mike steadied me.

“Now that’s a cool feature. What happens when you put your hand on the other pillar professor?” Richie questioned.

“It launches  _ you _ sky high, quick Ben push it!” I teased. Richie rolled his eyes, chuckling. I giggled and bit my lip, happy that I succeeded in mission make Richie laugh.

“Okay see this is  _ exactly _ why there are safety codes, why we have permits.” Eddie began as he strode over to Ben, smacking his hand for emphasis.

“This place is a death trap, you understand that?” He asked Ben.

“Well, it’s a work in progress, okay Eddie.” Ben replied sulkily.

“Just so you know, I get hurt and you are liable and also what is this? The switch of an iron maiden?” Eddie questioned, knocking the hanging silver device. I chuckled quietly, rolling my eyes in loving exasperation. 

“That-that’s a flashlight.”

“And what is that a horse hitch? When do you have horses dow- oh this is cool.” He knelt down and grabbed a paddle ball off of the ground.

“That was like three dollars so be careful with that please.” Ben mumbled. (A/N YOOOOO DO Y’ALL REMEMBER WHEN STUFF WAS CHEAP LMAO ME NEITHER 2000’S BBY WHAT’S GOOD)

“I have one of these.” Eddie tossed the ball in the air and began smacking it in Stan’s face, the ball mere inches away from his nose. Stan flinched back and shrunk away from it. I frowned, my mother of the group persona rising from her sleep as I recognized one of my babies was uncomfortable.

“Hey Stan do you see this?”

“Yea, that’s-okay can you maybe not-”

“Maybe not what? Yea yea hold on. Maybe not what? Maybe not what? Be awesome and have fun and celebrate the magic of the paddlebaaaal-” his paddle-ball-smacking grew faster and more intense until it flung out of his grip onto Stan, who pushed it away and onto the floor, effectively breaking it. I released a sigh and relaxed, slightly glaring at Eddie. 

“Wow. Oh good going fucknut you broke his thing.” Eddie said. I frowned.

“I broke it?” Stan argued.

“Yeah you broke it with your face.”

“Oh please Eddie c’mon. Man up and admit you broke Ben’s paddle ball because you were careless and that you’ll replace it. And apologize to Stan for being mean.” I groaned.

“Fuck no, I didn’t break it.”

“What?” Stan asked exasperatedly.

“I’m not putting my fucking hand down there.” Eddie stated, pointing the the wooden board covered hole that the ball had fallen into.

*flashback over*

Eddie grabbed the paddle-ball and blew on it, effectively doing absolutely nothing to the grimy ball. 

“Oh man that’s so cool.” Eddie whispered, handing it to me. 

“I can’t believe it’s still here.” I chuckled. 

“Oh my God.” Bill mumbled, looking around the place. 

“How do we all not remember that this was here?” Eddie asked. 

“Hey Losers.” A rough voice called out from a dark corner. 

We all shot our heads up. 

“Time to float.” The voice said. I gripped Eddie’s hand tightly as we all peered at the corner defensively. After a beat or two, Richie leaned out of the corner, laughing his ass off. 

“Fuck Richie-“

“Dude!”

“C’mon man really?”

“Remember when he used to say that shit? And he’d do that little dance.” Richie chuckled, imitating the dance and making carnival music noises. 

“Am I the only one who remembers this shit?” He asked. 

“Are you gonna be like this the entire time we’re home?” Eddie asked. 

“All right. Just trying to add some levity to this shit. I’ll go fuck myself.” Richie sighed and whistled as he walked away. 

“It smells so fucking terrible in here.” He muttered. 

“Hey you guys?” Bill said. I paused from looking at the pictures pinned to the column and headed over to him. He held up a large metal can. 

“This s-s-says Stan.” He whispered. “For the use of L-l-losers only.” He read. 

“Open it.” I pleaded. He nodded and began to pry it open. 

“Bill,” Eddie tried. 

“Eddie, please. I wanna know.” I mumbled. He sighed and gave a small nod. Slowly, Bill reached his hand in and pulled the item out. 

*flashback*

“The fuck is this?” Richie asked from his peaceful hammock, taking the hairnet Stan was offering him.

“So you don’t get spiders stuck in your hair when you’re down here.” He explained, smiling. (A/N I don’t care who you are if you didn’t find Stan’s adorable lil bean smile the cutest fuckin thing we can’t be friends)

“Stanley, we’re not afraid of fucking spiders.” Richie threw the hairnet down to where I was sat in front of the pillar and turned back to his comic book. (A/N THIS right here is why I have nightmares okay because that sounded NOTHING LIKE FINN WOLFHARD OKAY PEOPLE N O T H I N G DON’T YOU DARE DENY IT)

I chuckled as everyone paused in putting on their hairnets and Richie watched, disapprovingly.

“I stand corrected.” He sighed. Eddie ripped his hairnet off quickly, which I didn’t miss of course. “That’s a first.” Bevvie chuckled.

“Touche.” Richie agreed. Stan looked to me hopefully.

“Sorry Stan, believe me I would but my mother would have a field day if one hair was out of place.” I explained, holding up the hairnet for him to take. He nodded and took it back, giving me a small ‘I understand’ smiled and folding the hairnet neatly.

“Is your mom really that crackjob crazy?” Ben asked. Everyone but Mike looked up and stared at him. 

“You have noooo idea.” I mumbled, turning the page of my book. 

“Hey, Rich, your ten minutes are up.” Eddie stated, walking over to the hammock.

“What are you talking about?” Richie asked, looking up from his comic book.

“The hammock. Ten minutes each was the rule.” Eddie explained.

“I don’t see any sign.”

“Are you being this way right now? Really. No no no no. Why would there be a sign if it was a verbal agreement?!”

“I don’t remember-”

“And I remember you-(I don’t think)-agreeing-(I don’t think)-on-the fucking-rule!” Eddie shoved his way onto the hammock, essentially merging himself in-between Richies legs. 

“ _ I can see your vagina _ -”

“ _ Ten minutes each-!” _

_ “Go back in your dumb little corner I don’t want you in this hammock. I fucked your mom!-“ _

_ “No you didn’t! Take that back dickface-“ _

_ “Fuck you-!” _

“Girls, girls you’re both pretty now shut the fuck up im trying to read!” I yelled. They paused and then simultaneously hit me on the head. I winced and smacked them with my book. They continued to shove and groan, feet and hands flailing everywhere so I ducked to avoid them. Stan and I looked at each other and rolled our eyes, chuckling.

“There’s actually a summer program in Bar Harbor. Teaches you like, everything about architecture. I was thinking about applying.” Ben’s voice rang. 

“I’ll do that.” Richie muttered. “I’ll do anything to get the hell out of Derry.” Richie stated and shoved Eddie’s creeping foot out of the hammock roughly.

“Man when I graduate, I going to Florida.” Mike stated from his perch on the swing. 

“What’s in Florida Mike?” (A/N: Hurricanes, crocodiles/alligators, oranges, publix, beaches, Disney world, love bugs-) Ben asked. 

“I don’t know, ya know. I guess it’s just a place I’ve always wanted to go.” Mike grinned. (A/N FUCK WHY ARE THEY ALL SO SWEET AND TENDER WITH THER ADORABLE ASS SMILES I-)

“Stan you should go with Mike to Florida. You already act eighty. You’d clean up with all the grandmas.” Richie puckered his lips and made smooching sounds. (A/N yea um I live in Florida and can 100 % agree that Stan should come to Florida so I can hug my lil bird bby) Eddie and I chuckled whereas Mike shook his head, smiling.

“I think Stan would be great in a small, cozy town. All tall, dark and mysterious.” I smiled softly. He blushed and the others hooted and wolf-whistled.

“So Jane’s got a thing for Stannie huh?” Eddie joked.

“Hey ha ha ha so funny. But I was serious. I could totally see Stan with a trail of girls following his every move.” I giggled.

“Really?” he asked. I nodded sincerely.

“For sure. But, if you want  _ all  _ the ladies you  _ have  _ to lose the button ups.” I giggled. He blushed. 

“Do you guys think we’ll still be friends?” He questioned quietly. “When we’re older?”

“What?” Richie asked. 

“Why wouldn’t we be?” Ben added. 

“D-do any of your parents still hang out with their friends from middle school?” Stan pointed out. 

Eddie managed to toe Richie’s glasses off and they clattered to the ground behind me.

“I mean, things might be different then, we all might be different.” Stan said remorsefully.

“Maybe. But we aren’t our parents. We’re different. We have bonds stronger than others.” I replied. 

“We’ll always s-still be friends. I don’t-I don’t think that just, you know, g-g-goes away because we get older.” Bill stated. 

“Yeah Stan come on.” Bev smiled. “You don’t have to be so sad.”

My hands hit Richie’s glasses. I chuckled and grabbed them, carefully placing them on.

“Heyyyy look I’m Richie!” I joked, hopping up and slowly turning in a circle.

“Whaddya think?” I asked. The losers answered with a combination of wolf whistles, hollers and Richie groaning.

“Ha ha so funny.” he complained, flipping a page in his book.

“Waaait wait wait,” I took some deep breaths and looked up quickly.

“I’m Richie Tozier, I’m thirteen, and I fuck Eddie’s mom daily.” I said in a high pitched voice, thrusting my pelvis. The losers laughed, Bill doing so extremely loudly.

“What are you laughing at Billiam? Huh?  _ Geez spit it out b-b-b-Bill _ .” I flounced over to him as he sunk in a fit of laughter.

“Don’t think I missed you either  _ Ringwald _ .” I turned to Bev and poked her shoulder.

“Or you  _ Haystack. _ Say where’v you been lately?  _ The library? On purpose?  _ Heeeey  _ Homeschool!  _ Crazy crowd am I right? Oh well  _ welcome to the Losers Club  _ kiddo. Stan the Man! Jew with a plan.  _ We’re not afraid of fucking spiders. _ ” I circled all the way back and paused when I saw Richie’s face. He looked extremely upset, gripping his comic book tightly.

“Hey, Rich I was just joking. Sorry if I upset you.” I took off his glasses and handed them to him. He took them back and gave me a small nod.

*Later when everyone is leaving*

I waited until everyone else had left to approach Richie, needing to apologize again.

“Rich? I really am sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you.” I said as he paused, leg up and perched to hop on his bike. He sighed and put it down.

“I’m not offended, I just- I don’t want you all to think I’m some stupid kid. You all were laughing an-”

“Oh shit Richie you don’t think we were laughing  _ at  _ you do you?” He shrugged in response. I walked up to him and took his hand, his back still facing me.

“I’m so sorry ‘Chee, but we would never do that to you.”

“Pretty sure Stan would, once I really annoy him.”

“ _ I  _ would never do that to you.” I clarified.

“Richie you’re my best friend. I would never want to hurt you in anyway, I lo-” I paused, catching myself quickly and praying to God he didn’t hear that last bit.

“You mean more to me than anyone else I know.” I finished, recovering. He turned to look at me.

“Really? Promise?” he asked. I nodded.

“Then, do you promise not to tell anyone what I’m gonna tell you?” He looked extremely serious, so I matched his focus and nodded. He took a deep breath, looking at his feet.

“I’m gay.”


	11. Wuh-oh Gonna Sacrifice Eddie Spaghetti-o

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers figure out the next step to defeating Pennywise

I didn’t allow my mouth to drop open like it wanted to.

A thousand thoughts were running through my head.

“.....oh. Um, okaaaay.” 

Richie’s head whipped up.

“You’re not….disgusted?” he questioned, cringing.

“No!” I exclaimed, waving my hands to emphasize.

“Really?” 

“Absolutely. That’s...great? Sorry I don’t really know how to respond I’ve never really been in a situation like this but my point is I support you one hundred and ten percent.” I exhaled deeply, out of breath.

“...you don’t think I’m crazy?”

“No, Rich. I’m straight, and I honestly don’t…...understand what you feel, if you will, but that doesn’t matter to me.  ** _You _ ** matter to me. If you like guys then I’ll support you. No matter what.” I smiled. Tears built in his eyes.

“Oh, ‘Chee should I not have said that? I swear I didn’t mean that in a bad way! I support and like you no matter wha-” Richie bolted to me and hugged me, sobbing onto my shoulder. I froze, reaching up to hug him slowly.

“ _ Th-thank you.” _ He cried. I smiled sadly, trying to ignore the tears in my eyes.

“Anytime.” I mumbled. We stood there for a total of fourteen minutes ( _ I counted.) _ Richie eventually pulled back and wiped his nose.

“M’not fully gay. I think the term is bisexual, but, yea. I guess I like dick.” He sniffed. I chuckled lightly.

“I suppose you do.” 

“Well, gotta go. See ya princess.”

“Bye trashmouth.”

He hopped on his bike and paused before turning to face me. 

“Hey Jane? You mean more to me than anyone else too.” He smiled. 

“Promise?” I asked, grinning. 

“Promise.” He nodded. 

I waited until he was out of sight to head to the diner for a milkshake and fries, thinking the entire way there.

_ So there’s literally no way. _

_ No way in hell. _

_ God I hope he doesn’t end up going to hell. _

_ Those are lies and rumors right? _

_ I don’t know. _

_ Anyways. _

_ My point was. _

_ ...I really shouldn’t talk to myself. _

_ Too late now I guess. _

_ So. _

_ Richie has absolutely noooo interest in me. _

_ He likes dick. _

_ THAT’S inappropriate. _

_ Be more medical. _

_ Richie likes penis. _

_ Nope that’s worse. _

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


_ He did say bisexual though. _

  
  
  


*flashback over*

“Sad.” Beverly whispered in remembrance. We were all sitting now, me leaning against Bill’s knee, needing the reassurance. 

“He was old before his time.” Ben smiled. 

“Yeah.” Eddie agreed. 

“Him and his button ups.” I chuckled, a tear falling down. 

“I wonder what he was like all grown up.” Eddie pondered. 

“Probably what he was like as a kid.” Richie supplied. “The best.”

“Soft.” I replied, a small sob bubbling out. “He was soft, and sweet. Considerate, and...I remember the overwhelming feeling of motivation. He had I reason but I-“ I sighed. “ I just can’t figure it out.” Bill ran his hand through my hair gently, easing my searching mind. 

“Here.” Bill tossed the hairnet to Richie.

“You always were closer to Stan.” Eddie mumbled. 

“I was close with all of you.” I corrected. 

“Well yeah but, I don’t know you and Stan always had this...connection.” Ben inputted. 

“Yeah. He always came to you for everything. Told you things he never told us.” Bill agreed. 

*flashback*

“Hey Jane?” Stan asked. 

“Yes?” I responded, looking up from my book and smiling at his upside down appearance from my position on the bed. 

“Do you think it’s possible to love more than one person?” He quipped. I pondered, sitting up to face him better. 

“I suppose that depends on the version of love we’re theorizing on.”

“What do you mean?” He frowned. 

“Well there’s two types of love. Familia love, which is the love you feel for your family, or romantic love, which is what you feel for your soulmate.” I explained. 

“Well, what if you had two soulmates? How would you choose?” Stan asked. I tilted my head, deep in thought. 

“I’m not entirely sure. But I suppose you choose who you love the most. Whenever I’m stuck between two options like let’s say two shirts, I flip a coin. Whichever side I’m hoping it lands on is the one I want most.” I shrugged. “Maybe do something like that.”

“That’s a good idea.” Stan nodded. “Thanks Jane.”

  
  


*flashback over*

“I suppose.” I shrugged. 

“All right Mike what are we doing here?” Richie asked. 

“The ritual.” Mike stood up. “To perform it, it requires a sacrifice.”

“Sacrifice? I nominate Eddie.” Richie decided. 

“Wait what?” he freaked. 

“Absolutely not.” I argued. 

“What why not! He’s the smallest out of all of us.” Richie whined. 

“And the cutest out of all of us, ( _ Hey assholes! I’m five nine _ !) except maybe Ben.” I blew him a kiss. “He’s definitely stud material.”

“Yeah you’re not wrong about that.” He agreed. 

“We are not sacrificing me.” Eddie stated. 

“But you’re perfect! Because you’re little you’ll fit on a barbeque.” Richie explained, using his hands to gesture a tiny spit.

“I’m five nine it’s like average height in most of the world.” He argued. 

“What if this isn’t those parts of the world?” I questioned. 

“Ha ha! That’s a second!” Richie cheered. 

“You’re on his side now?” Eddie whined. 

“It’s, not that kind of a sacrifice guys.” Bill interrupted. 

“Mike?” Bev whispered. 

“The past is buried. But you’re gonna have to dig it up. Piece by piece. And these pieces, these artifacts, that’s why we’re here. They are what you’ll sacrifice. And since Stan isn’t here to find his, I figured we should all be here together to find his artifact.” Mike concluded. 

“I think Bill just did that.” Eddie stated, pulling the hairnet on his head and sighing.


	12. On the Hunt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane sets off to find her token

“Okay Mike, so where do we find our tokens?” Eddie asked. 

“Yeah I gotta be honest, man all due respect. This is fucking stupid, all right? Why do we need tokens? All right? We already remember everything. Uh, saving Bev, defeating It, I mean, we’re caught up!” Richie yelled. 

“It’s not everything. We fought. But what happened after that?  _ Before _ the house on Neibolt. Think.” Mike told us. 

“W-w-we c-c-can’t remember, can we?” Bill asked. 

“See there’s more to our story. What happened that summer. And those blank spaces, like pages torn out of a book. That’s what you need to find. We need to split up. You each need to find your artifact. Alone. That’s important. When you do, meet me at the library tonight.” Mike ordered. 

“Yeah, I gotta- I gotta say statistically speaking, you look at survival scenarios, we’re gonna do much better as a group.” Eddie pointed out. 

“I agree, isn’t it best to stick together?” I asked. 

“Yeah splitting up would be dumb, man. Okay we gotta go together. All right? We were together that summer, right?”

“No. Not that w-w-whole summer.” Bill reminded us. 

*flashback*

“ _ Take it back! You’re scared, and we all are, but take it back!” He shoved Richie.  _

_ “Bill!” I shouted warningly. Richie shoved him back.  _

_ “Guys stop!” I yelled. Bill pulled Richie by his shirt and punched him.  _

_ “Bill!” Beverly yelled. Richie got up and tried to attack. Stan and Mike held him back while Beverly and Ben grabbed Bill’s arm. I stood in between them.  _

_ “Stop it! Just stop! You both are acting like assholes!” I yelled. Bill tried to push past me to Richie but I held him back.  _

_ “Your just a bunch of losers! Fuck off! Your just a bunch of losers and your gonna get yourself killed trying to catch that fucking stupid clown!” Richie yelled.  _

_ “Richie stop!” Stan said.  _

_ “STOP!” Beverly shouted. We let go of Bill, and Stan and Mike let go of Richie.  _

_ “This is what it wants. It wants to divide us! We were all together when we hurt it, that’s why we’re still alive!” She explained.  _

_ “Yeah? Well I plan to keep it that way.” Richie walked to me.  _

_ “Richie-“ I started.  _

_ “Leave me alone. I mean it Ripsom.” He muttered and shouldered me. Stan left as well. Then Ben slowly followed. Mike turned and started to walk away too. _

*flashback over*

“That’s right. We all broke apart.” My chest heaved, repressed sadness clawing at my chest. 

“Jane?” Bill headed toward me, concerned.

“No, I-I need to go.” I stammered and ran, cutting through the bushes and branches until I arrived all the way back at the studio, my breath gone and face smeared with some dirt and tears. I headed inside, feeling calmer as I let myself get lost in the musical equipment around me. I took a deep breath and assessed my memories and feelings. I felt upset, and confused and angry.  _ Anger could work.  _

_ I’m angry _

_ I’m upset  _

_ It’s all repressed  _

_ Coming out _

_ Flowing _

_ I’m edgy _

_ I’m done  _

_ I’m sharp and ready to fight _

_ “White shirt now red, my bloody nose _

_ Sleeping, you're on your tippy toes _

_ Creeping around like no one knows _

_ Think you're so criminal _

_ Bruises, on both my knees for you _

_ Don't say thank you or please _

_ I do what I want when I'm wanting to _

_ My soul? So cynical _

_ So you're a tough guy _

_ Like it really rough guy _

_ Just can't get enough guy _

_ Chest always so puffed guy _

_ I'm that bad type _

_ Make your mama sad type _

_ Make your girlfriend mad tight _

_ Might seduce your dad type _

_ I'm the bad guy, duh.” _

I inhaled deeply, my mind clear now that I had gotten that out of my system. 

_ Where do I go? What’s my token? _

I sat down in a nearby chair. 

_ What here is important to me.  _

_ What matters most.  _

_ What impacted me.  _

Suddenly it hit me. 

_ Neibolt was not the first time we’d had a fight _

*flashback*

I walked up to the ice cream truck, searching the flavors for one I liked. 

“Hey J-J-Jane!” 

I turned and smiled as Bill and his friends appeared. 

“Hi Billy! Hi guys how are you?” I replied, giving Bill a hug. 

“Fine.” Stan replied shortly. My shoulders dropped and I gave a small nod. 

“G-g-guys-“ Bill tried. 

“No, Bill it’s okay. I understand, they don’t have to like me.” I shrugged and faced front. 

“Why’re you friends with the  _ princess  _ anyways Bill?” Eddie piped up. My skin lit on fire and I bristled. 

“She’s annoying and stupid and thinks she’s  _ oh-so-perfect  _ with her perfect life-“

“That’s not true!” I yelled, whipping around. 

“J-Jane-“ Bill tried to stop me.

“No Billy! I’m not gonna hear this anymore.” I grabbed Eddie’s hand and dragged him out of the store. 

“Where are you taking him?!” Stan shouted, him, Bill and the silent Richie following me. 

“I’m taking  _ all of you  _ to see the truth.” I growled. I dragged them to their bikes and hopped on Silver, directing Bill where to turn. We rode way off, to the outskirts of Derry. We arrived at a grassy plain area in a few hours. 

“Stop here.” I ordered. Bill slowed to a stop and I hopped off, heading through a few trees and bushes to an old farmhouse. Once we arrived I pushed the huge doors open and walked in, turning to face the Losers sharply. 

“You wanted to know me? Who I really am?” I shouted, my voice echoing in the empty barn. Stan and Eddie stared judgmentally at me while Bill shifted awkwardly and Richie looked about.

“This. This is it. This is me. I lived in that stall over there, Betty was here, and my mom and dad-“ I choked up, looking at the small horse stall. 

“My mom and dad were there.” I finished. 

“I’m not the glamorous girl my step mother pretends to make me. I’m more than that. So don’t you dare pretend you know who I am or what I went through growing up because you have  _ no  _ idea.” I muttered, walking to the end of the barn. I wiped my tears away, chuckling to myself. 

“ _ Hey mom _

_ Dead mom _

_ I need a little help here _

_ I’m prob’ly talking to myself here _

_ But dead mom I gotta ask _

_ Are you really in the ground _

_ Cuz I feel you all around me _

_ Are you here _

_ Dead mom _

_ Dead mom _

_ Dead mom,  _

_ I’m tired of trying to iron out my creases _

_ I’m a bunch of broken pieces  _

_ It was you who made me whole _

_ Everyday dads starin at me, _

_ Like all hurry up get happy _

_ Move along _

_ Forget about your mom _

_ But daddy’s in denial  _

_ Daddy doesn’t wanna feel _

_ He wants me to smile and clap _

_ Like a perfoming seal _

_ Ignored it for a while  _

_ But daddy’s lost his mind for real _

_ You won’t believe the mess _

_ That we’ve become _

_ Your my home _

_ My destination  _

_ And I’m your clone _

_ Your strange creation  _

_ You held my hand _

_ And life came easy _

_ Now jokes don’t land _

_ And no one sees me _

_ Nothing seems to fit _

_ Momma is this it? _

_ Are you receiving? _

_ I want something to believe in _

_ Or I’m done _

_ Take me where my soul can  _

_ Run _

_ Or I’ll be in my bedroom  _

_ Wake me when I’m twenty  _

_ One _

_ Daddy’s moving forward  _

_ Daddy didn’t lose a mom _

_ Momma won’t you send a sign _

_ I’m running out of hope and time _

_ A plague of mice _

_ A lightning strike _

_ Or drop a nuclear bomb _

_ No more playing daddy’s game  _

_ I’ll go insane if things don’t change _

_ Whatever it takes to make him _

_ Say your name _

_ Dead mom.” _

I sighed in defeat, glancing backwards at the Loser’s before running back home, embarrassed, depressed, and lonely.

*flashback*

I sighed, running my hands down my parents old blanket still in the barn. My cab was waiting for me outside patiently, so I couldn’t take  _ too  _ long, but I also had some time. I walked through the barn, unsure if my token was really here. The place brought back memories, that was for sure. But not too many with the Losers. I sighed and walked back to the cab. 

“Where to next?” The driver asked. I pondered for a moment.

“Can you drive me to the prison?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay first off- Beetlejuice is FANTASTIC so expect more songs from the musical. Second, the whole Jane finding her token thing will be for MULTIPLE chapters, sorry   
Also, who do you think Jane is visiting?? Comment below


	13. Piece by Piece

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane goes to visit her parents

I exited the cab, giving a small wave to the nice driver as he drove away, and turned, facing the prison. I took a deep breath, my hands shaking as I remembered the last time I had come here. 

*flashback to the summer of ‘92*

“Jane I don’t think this is a good idea.” Eddie whined. 

“Please, Eddie I need to do this.” I begged. He sighed. 

“Are you sure? I can come in if you need it.” He offered. I shook my head. 

“No. This is something I need to do on my own. Thank you though.” I gave him a small kiss on the cheek and turned, facing the prison. I closed my eyes, breathed in slowly, and walked in. The guards looked at me, a tad confused. 

“Um, hi. My name is Jane Ripsom? I’m here to see my parents.” I explained, fiddling with my hands. They nodded and one of them wrapped his arm comfortingly around me as he led me to the room. It was completely empty, save for a few guards, and my breathing escalated as I sat down and picked up the phone, ansty. My breathing just about stopped when my parents came out, older and scruffier looking. 

“Hello mother. Hi dad.” I said, a weak smile covering my face. 

“Hi Jane.” My mother answered briskly. Silence took over. 

“Um, I’m here visiting for a month. Nick’s at one of his friends houses in a town outside of Derry though.”

“Where are you staying?” My mother asked, glaring eyes seeping right through me.

“Um with a friend, Richie Tozier?” I replied. 

“Of course. You would be with that rotten boy.” My mother growled. 

“D-don’t call him that mom. He’s an amazing boy-“

“He’s a disgusting middle finger to everything that is society! He’s a rude, careless  _ freak  _ who stole my daughter from me!” My mother yelled. 

“Mother you and dad lost me the minute you said  _ I do. _ ” I argued. “Richie has done  _ nothing _ but support me and help me when I was being tortured by  _ you two. _ Why do you even care that I’m with him? You didn’t care before I left, y-you said you were happy for me then!” I shouted. 

“Yes well you weren’t a celebrity then.” My mother spat. My heart sunk. 

“That boy is a demon.” My father growled. 

“No! No I can’t believe I’m hearing this right now! Richie and the Losers  _ saved  _ me the from the chains you had me wrapped and drowning with! And now you want me back as your daughter because I’m some  _ celebrity?  _ You didn’t even want me to sing  ** _in the first place!_ **

_ And all I remember is your back _

_ Walking towards the school, leaving me behind in your dust _

_ I traveled fifteen hundred miles to see you _

_ I begged you to want me, but you didn't want to _

_ But piece by piece,  _ ** _he_ ** _ collected me up _

_ Off the ground, where you abandoned things  _

_ Piece by piece he filled the holes that you burned in me at _

_ Ten years old and you know _

_ He never walks away _

_ He never asks for money _

_ He takes care of me _

_ He likes me _

_ Piece by piece, he restores my faith _

_ That a man can be kind and maybe could, stay _

_ And all of your words fall flat _

_ I made something of myself and now you wanna come back _

_ But your love, it isn't free, it has to be earned _

_ Back then I didn't have anything you needed so I was worthless _

_ But piece by piece,  _ ** _he_ ** _ collected me up _

_ Off the ground, where you abandoned things  _

_ Piece by piece he filled the holes that you burned in me at _

_ Ten years old and you know _

_ He never walks away _

_ He never asks for money _

_ He takes care of me _

_ 'Cause he likes me _

_ Piece by piece, he restored my faith _

_ That a man can be kind and maybe could, stay _

_ Piece by piece _

_ Piece by piece I fell far from the tree _

_ I will never leave them like you left me _

_ And they will never have to wonder their worth _

_ Because unlike you I'm going to put them first and you know _

_ They’ll never walk away, _

_ They’ll never break my heart _

_ They’ll take care of things, they’ll love me _

_ Piece by piece, they restored my faith _

_ That a man can be kind and family should be great _

_ Piece by piece _

_ Piece by piece.” _

(Piece by Piece by Kelly Clarkson ((with some altered lyrics)))

I bolted out of the prison, crashing into Eddie’s arms. 

“Jane? Jane what happened, are you okay?”

I shook all over, and moved my head ‘no’ as I sobbed against him. He pulled me over to the side of the prison, propping my by the wall while he called Richie from a nearby phone station. I hugged my knees, hiccuping and crying, until he finished. He plopped down next to me and pulled me in front of him, comforting me as we waited.

*flashback over*

I prayed this would be nothing like then. Taking deep breaths, I walked inside and headed to the first guard I saw. 

“Um, hello? I’m here to see Mr. and Mrs. Ripsom?” I asked. The officer nodded and brought me through a door, into a waiting room, and left. I waited patiently, tapping my toes in silence. 

_ “Jane.” _

The hairs on my neck stood up. I turned ever so slowly to my left. 

“ _ We’ve been waiting for you.” _

There, at the end of the hall, stood my parents.

“M-mom? Dad? W-what are you doing out here?” I stuttered, clutching the sides of my jeans.

“ _ Haven’t you heard Jane? Our sentence is up. We’re free now.”  _ My father growled.

_ “You didn’t think you could run from us forever little Janie, did you?”  _ My stepmother cackled as they took slow steps towards me.

“I-I-”

_ “You haven’t been following our rules, Jane. You ran from us. You  _ ** _left us._ ** _ You know what that means, don’t you,  _ ** _Jane._ ** _ ”  _ My stepmother muttered evilly. As they grew closer, their appearance began to change, skin growing grey, wet and mutilated. Water began to seep onto the floor, lightly covering the tiles I stood on.

_ “How many years has it been since you left with Nick, Jane?  _ ** _Twenty seven?_ ** _ ”  _ My father asked, stripping off his belt.

“D-dad no-”

_“You can’t escape your past Jane. You will _**_never_**_ escape us. Do you hear me? _**_Never_**_.”_ My parents slowly morphed together, growing into a dark grey demonic being. I screamed and ran to the door, shoving my body against it, trying desperately to get out.

** _“NEVER AS LONG AS YOU LIVE ON THIS EARTH! YOU WILL NEVER ESCAPE ME. I’LL ALWAYS BE HERE JANE!” _ ** The being took the shape and voice of Pennywise, but still maintained its dark grey demonic form.

“ _ LEAVE ME ALONE!”  _ I screeched, and plunged my elbow through the glass in the door, opening the handle through the other side and bolting right into one of the officers.

“Woah, miss are you okay?” he asked. I turned, ready to point out Pennywise but only saw a few people looking at me, confused.

“I-um-” I mumbled, feeling faint.

“We checked with the chiefs miss, your parents died about five years ago.” he informed me, pulling me up from my sinking position.

“O-oh.” I shook myself and ran outside, gasping for air as I climbed into the Taxi.

“Take me to the main town, please.”


	14. Love, is a Many Splendored Thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane remembers multiple things

I waved goodbye to the nice taxi man and shoved my hands in my pink leather jacket, shivering as I felt the entire town, even the structures, glare at me. 

_ Where the hell is my token _

I frowned as I tried to pry into my past, searching through my scattered memories. I walked faster, barely looking at my surroundings as my mind raced. However, I paused as I saw a store I recalled oh so regrettably. 

*flashback to a few days after the fight by Neibolt*

I smashed the button on the game, trying my hardest to finally beat the first level of pac man but utterly failing. I sighed in defeat and grabbed my bag of quarters, peeking over at where Richie was playing street fighter with some guy. I swallowed my sigh and moved over to an empty racing game, sitting down and digging for some tokens in the bag.

“Dude, why’re you being weird? I’m not your fucking boyfriend.” A voice stated loudly. My head snapped up and I turned to see Richie awkwardly holding a quarter and the boy he was with frowning at him. My possessive triggers perked. 

“Whoa, I- I didn’t-”

“What the fucks going on here?” 

Bowers and his gang sauntered in, ruining my life once again. 

“You assholes didn’t tell me your town is full of little fairies.” the boy yelled, pointing at Richie. 

“Richie fucking Tozier? What? You’re trying to bone my little cousin? GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE FAGGOT!” He screamed. 

“HEY!” I yelled, causing everyone to look at me.

“Cut it out Bowers. Leave him alone. Go be demeaning and shit somewhere else.” I demanded.

“The fuck did you say to me?” he walked towards me, shoving Richie out of his way. Steam poured out of my ears.

“Are you fucking deaf? Leave Tozier alone and fuck off kindly, please.” I marched up to him, not caring that I had to tilt my chin up a lot to actually meet his eyes.

“Tozier huh? Trouble in paradise? What was he not dicking you down good enough, like I did?” he smirked. 

_ Okay, that’s enough _

I kicked his balls and shoved him against one of the arcade games.

“A lot of men could do way better than you Bowers. Even Tozier. I’m sure the druggie in the alley over there has way more meat than your little shrimp does.” I stated. Everyone ooo’d and my confidence and strength grew quite a bit. Henry growled and tried to shove me off but I jabbed my heel into his shin and scraped it down, blood trailing down with the sharp, pointed heel. He groaned in pain and I shoved him harder to get his attention.

“Listen up fuckwad. If I  _ ever _ so much as hear a rumour that you are bullying  _ any _ one, I’ll rip that pathetic thing you call a dick right off and shove it down your throat until you choke to death, understood? Now apologize to Tozier, start using proper grammer like  _ well enough _ not  _ good enough, _ and leave the fucking premicise.  ** _NOW._ ** ” I gritted out. To my suprise, he actually left. Sure he didn’t do anything else I asked but like, he listened. 

_ Wowza _

I turned smugly and paused in my tracks, realizing literally  _ everyone _ was staring at me.

“....what?” I asked.

“You didn’t have to fucking do that Ripsom.” Richie muttered. I couldn’t believe my fucking ears.  _ I saved his fucking ass and he’s mad about it? _

“The fuck I didn’t.” I stated.

“Yea. You really fucking didn’t. Do you realize what a huge target you just put on my back?!” Richie yelled as he started to me. 

“Right cuz it’s always about you right? Look it’s not my fault Bowers is a dick and called you what he did. But I wasn’t going to stand around and watch like every other fucking idiot in this stupid town. I realize that you enjoy that for some fucking reason but that’s your choice. I wasn’t sticking up for you, or gays, or anyone in particular,” I turned to face everyone. “Not that there’s anything wrong with homosexuals.” I turned back to Richie. 

“I said what I said for Derry and myself. That’s it. You can rot in a sewer like Georgie, Betty, Ed Corcoran and everyone else in this damn town for all I care.” I muttered and left the arcade, wiping the tears sliding down my face aggressively and convincing myself that I meant what I said.

  
  


*flashback over*

I wiped the tear sliding down my cheek away, and continued to walk away hurriedly. 

_ You can’t run from the past, Jane. You know nothing’s changed. He’s still gay. He’s still in love with… _

*flashback to the summer of ‘92*

“Hey, Rich?” I asked, as I washed the dishes.

“Yeah babe?” he responded, putting away and drying the dishes.

“Have you ever… been in love?” I questioned. He put down the plate he was holding.

“I-um…..well yes I suppose.”

“Like, recently?” I pressed. His face grew extremely red.

“Uh-maybe? Wh-what are you getting at hun?” his voice rose an octave or two and he picked up the plate again, distracting himself. I paused, closing my eyes and turning to him.

“Are you in love with Eddie?”

The plate he was holding crashed to the floor.

“What the  _ fuck _ Jane.”

“I-I just see the way you are with him and it’s differen-”

“ _ What. The.  _ ** _FUCK. _ ** _ Jane.” _

“-and you guys are super close, like we’re all close but you guys are  _ close close _ an-”

“Jane shut the fuck up.”

I closed my mouth, fully concerned now. He was silent and still, and if you knew Richie, you knew he was  _ never  _ silent and still.

“What if I am?” he asked quietly.

“W-what do you mean?” I whispered.

“What if I am in love with him?! Are you gonna treat me differently?! Are you gonna shun me like every other person in this God forsaken town?! So maybe I’m in love with both of my best friends is that really so bad?!” He yelled. I shrunk down in terror and confusion.

“‘Chee, I- I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked-”

“No Jane answer me! Do you hate me now? Huh?! Are you gonna send me to a catholic school in California like my parents because  _ how dare I love someone of the same gender as me? _ ”He screamed, throwing one of the glasses at a cabinet. He crumpled to the ground, breathing harshly. I continued to hold my knees to my chest for a few minutes before slowly crawling over to him, and pulling him into my arms gently.

“Richie, I could  _ never  _ hate you. Be upset and mad in a fight, yes. But I could and would  ** _never _ ** hate you, especially for your own life choices. I’m sorry that your parents are complete and utter assholes but I am  _ not _ your parents.” I whispered, combing his hair with my fingers gently as he began to sob into my chest. 

“Hey Jane?” Richie asked as we headed upstairs to bed a few hours later.

“Yes ‘Chee?” I responded, turning to face him at the top of the stairs.

“You know what I meant, right? When I said I-I loved  _ both _ of my best friends?” He mumbled.

“Yes, Richie. And for the record, I love my best  _ friend _ too.” I smiled, kissing him on the cheek and walking away.

“Wait, as in, another best friend?” He called after me.

“You know what I meant!”

*flashback over*

_ He couldn’t marry us both. Could he? _

I swatted a branch away, frowning in thought, and stopped.

*flashback to before IT* *Richie’s pov*

“I hate skirts.” Jane whined to me as we walked home together, after a long day of school. 

“So do I, you should take yours off.” I smirked. She ignored my comment and continued. 

“Seriously ‘Chee! I feel like Sandra Dee in these stupid things.” She groaned and picked at her skirt. 

“ _ Look at me, _

_ I’m Sandra Dee.  _

_ Lousy with Virginity, _

_ Won’t go to bed till I’m legally wed! _

_ I can’t! _

_ I’m Sandra Deeee!”  _ She sang in a high pitched voice (Look at me I’m Sandra Dee from Grease)

“You aren’t Sandy!” I chuckled. She rolled her eyes and counted on her fingers. 

“I don’t drink-“

“No!” I fake gasped. 

“-or swear-“

“Oh!” I clutched my chest exaggeratedly. She giggled and played along. 

“-I don’t rat my hair-“ she added a southern twang to it. 

“EWWWWW!” I shouted. 

“I get ill from one cigarette *fake cough*” she slapped a nearby tree branch. 

“KEEP your FILTHY PAWS off my silky drawers, would you pull that crap with Annette?” She shouted at it. I wheezed with laughter. She smiled and giggled too. 

“Okay, okay, you aren’t a rule breaker. But that’s not a bad thing!” I replied. She raised her eyebrow. 

“Hear me out, hear me out. You don’t break the rules. I do. I try to break the rules, you pull my ear, I don’t make a  _ ton  _ of trouble, you get to be a lil loose, we’re the perfect team!” I explained. She chuckled sadly. 

“Of course we are. But, idk. Shouldn’t I be a little…..looser? I mean for fucks sake everyone calls me a princess and thinks I’m too stiff. I can break the rules!” She groaned. 

“Well fuck em. They don’t know you. Not like I know you.” I looked at her. 

_ They don’t  _ ** _love_ ** _ you, not like I  _ ** _love_ ** _ you _

“You know what. I’m gonna smoke a cigarette. Or wear shorts. Maybe graffiti something-“

“Woah woah woah easy tiger. You’re gonna get in some serious trouble if you do that.” I replied seriously. 

“That’s the point isn’t it?! I’m plain Jane. Literally! I hate it. It sucks being me, and it’s not like people would actually like me for it-“

“Okay that’s where I draw the line. You are NOT plain Jane. And if some douchebag can’t see how amazing you are then that fucker doesn’t even deserve you, okay?” I growled. 

“Oh come on Richie! I mean look at me. No, really. Look at me.” I stopped and turned to her. 

“Would you ever in the history of everything even  _ consider  _ being with me?” She asked me seriously. 

I gulped. 

_ Yesyesyesyesholyfuckyesyesyes _

“I...uh…”

“Exactly.” She sighed and continued walking. 

“No, wait!!” I grabbed her arm. She turned to me, confused. I stuttered and rubbed the back of my head. 

“I-I guess if-ya know we were- _ romantically _ -uh-“

“Spit it out Rich, you sound like Big Bill.” She crossed her arms. 

“Yes!” I blurted. She raised an eyebrow. 

“Yes what?” She asked confusedly, tilting her head. 

_ God she’s adorable  _

“Yes, I, uh, would date you. Ya know if, we-“ I made random gestures with my hands. 

She looked taken aback.

“Really?” She asked timidly, playing with her necklace and hands the way she did when she was nervous. 

“Well….yeah.” I replied, wondering if I’d crossed a line. She smiled softly. 

“Thanks Rich.” 

“No problem.” I smiled as we continued walking. 

_ She’s got no fucking idea _

“You’re still an idiot ya know.” She teased. 

I grinned. 

“Douchebag.”

“Dickwad.”

“Stinky Breath.”

“Spaghetti on a stick!”

“*le gasp*”

*flashback over*

I smiled fondly. 

_ No matter who he chooses, I don’t think I’ll ever love anyone else as much as I’ll always love him. _


	15. Are You Out There, Do You Know Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the summer of '92 again, and Jane is being pulled to something
> 
> (also a lot of frozen two songs ((literally half of the chapter is just lyrics srry not srry)) because the songs fit PERFECTLY into the story and it was a great movie tbh)

*Summer of ‘92*

“Hey, ‘Chee?” I mumbled as we headed to the clubhouse where Eddie had called a meeting.

“Yeah?”

“Have you...I don’t know, heard voices? Like….ever…?” I stuttered, cringing a little.

“Um, no? I’m not Henry Bowers.” He chuckled.

“Yeah, yeah.” I laughed softly, looking out to my right.

** _Ja-ane   
_ **

“So. We only have two weeks, six days, sixteen hours, twenty four minutes an-”

“Don’t. Say how many seconds, Eds.” I cut in. Eddie sighed.

“Alright point is, we need to make a game plan. What do we do, when do we do it, where do we do it-”

“Why don’t we just hang out, like old times?” Ben questioned.

“Because Benjamin this isn’t old times. We can’t just be thirteen again.” Eddie argued.

“Why not?”

Everyone snapped their heads to me.

“Hey don’t kill me, just a suggestion.” I shrugged.

“How do we be thirteen again, that’s not physically possible.” Stan reasoned.

“Well no, of course not. But I see no reason as to why we can’t just go back to normal.

_Yes, the wind blows a little bit colder_

_And we're all getting older_

_And the clouds are moving on with every Autumn breeze_

_Sure our Clubhouse is becoming fertilizer_

_And we’re a little sadder and wiser_

_That's why I rely on certain certainties_

_Yes, some things never change_

_Like the feel of your hand in mine_

_Some things stay the same_

_Like how we get along just fine_

_Like an old stone wall that will never fall_

_Some things are always true_

_Some things never change_

_Like how I'm holding on tight to you.” _I sang gleefully as we all headed outside.

** _The winds are restless, could that be why I'm hearing this call?_ **

** _Is something coming? I'm not sure I want things to change at all._ **

I shuddered, forcing myself to focus on real life and not my thoughts**_  
_**

** **

_“These days are precious, can't let them slip away_

_We can't freeze this moment, but we can still go out and seize this day_

_Some things never change_

_Turn around and the time has flown_

_Some things stay the same_

_Though the future remains unknown_

_May our good luck last, may our past be past_

_Time's moving fast, it's true_

_Some things never change_

_And I'm holding on tight to you.”_

_(Some Things Never Change from Frozen 2)  
_

“Let’s go camping!” I decided. The Losers all agreed and, two hours later, we paraded into the barrens proudly holding our equipment. We found an Eddie and Stan approved spot and set up shop excitedly.

“Here.” I handed Stan another pole thing to shove into the tent.

“Thanks. Hey, this was a good idea. We’ve all really missed you and, I don’t know, I guess it just-”

_Ja-ane_

I snapped my head to the woods.

_Ja-ane_

“Jane?”

I flinched, shaking myself.

“Sorry, I um-zoned out. What were you saying?” I fake smiled, desperately trying to pay attention to Stan’s words.

*that night*

I shivered, zipping up the hoodie I stole from Ben before leaving the dog pile. Stan had requested that we all bring our own tents (_there is _**_no _**_way I’m sleeping in the same tent as Richie-) _but I’d begged him to let us all share Mike’s big tent.

_Ja-ane_

I sighed, glaring at the empty forest around me.

_Ja-ane_

_“I can hear you, but I won't_

_Some look for trouble while others don't_

_There's a thousand reasons I should go about my day_

_And ignore your whispers, which I wish would go away, oh-oh-oh_

** _Ja-ane_ **

_Oh-oh_

** _Ja-ane.”_ **

I shook my head, walking briskly into the forest

_“You're not a voice_

_You're just a ringing in my ear_

_And if I heard you, which I don't_

_I'm spoken for, I fear_

_Everyone I've ever loved is here within these walls_

_I've had my adventure, I don't need something new_

_I'm afraid of what I'm risking if I follow you.”_

I crossed under the bridge, following the voice to the main town.

_Into the unknown_

_Into the unknown_

** _Ja-ane_ **

_What do you want? 'Cause you've been keeping me awake_

_Are you here to distract me so I make a big mistake?_

_Or are you someone out there who's a little bit like me?_

_Who knows deep down I'm not where I'm meant to be?_

_Every day's a little harder as I feel my power grow_

_Don't you know there's part of me that longs to go_

_Into the unknown?_

_Into the unknown_

_Into the unknown_

** _Ja-ane_ **

The voice grew louder, stronger, _pulling _me to something, somewhere.

_Oh-oh-oh_

_Are you out there?_

_Do you know me?_

_Can you feel me?_

_Can you show me?_

_Ah-ah-oh, _ ** _Ja-ane_ **

_Ah-ah-oh, _ ** _Ja-ane_ **

_Ah-ah-oh, _ ** _Ja-ane_ **

_Ah-ah-oh, _ ** _Ja-ane_ **

_Oh-oh, oh-oh_

_Oh-oh, oh-oh_

_Oh-oh, oh-oh_

_Oh-oh, oh-oh_

_Where are you going?_

_Don't leave me alone_

_How do I follow you_

_Into the unknown?”_

_(Into the Unknown from Frozen 2)  
_

_“_ ** _JANE!!”_ **

I paused, in sheer terror, at where I was standing. In front of me was that dusty, bloody, crumbling well.

“Jane stop!!” I was jerked back from the well, still in shock, but now with Eddie’s face in front of mine.

“Jane what were you doing?! Were you really about to go back down there what were you thinking?!-“

“I’m hearing a voice.” I stated, my hands now clammy and shaking.

“W-What?” Eddie shook himself. “Wait, hold up let’s get out of here first.” And with that he whisked next out, gripping tightly to my hand.

A/N, Expect more Frozen 2 songs because that movie was FABULOUS idc what ANYONE else says (and, cuz the songs fit the story, of course)


	16. Never Gonna Give You Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eddie and Jane chat in the diner

“So, you’ve been hearing a voice ever since you got here and  _ you didn’t think to tell anyone?!” _ Eddie hissed, leaning over the diner table.

“Oh, right cuz it’s so easy to go  _ hey by the way I’m hearing a voice and it’s pulling me somewhere and I don’t know where and the last time this happened to anyone Henry Bowers ended up killing three people and getting  _ ** _locked up in an asylum!!!_ ** ” I hissed back.

“Well you could have at least told me! I mean, we’re best friends aren’t we?” He asked, shrinking back into his seat. I frowned.

“Of course we are, what are you talking about?” I asked. He grimaced.

“Well, I mean, we aren’t talking like we used to, we aren’t as close. You used to call me every day, Jane. And that’s when you lived here! But then you moved and, no calls, no letters, no contact, then I find out you’re  _ actually here _ and you’ve been hiding it from me.” He ranted.

“Oh, Ed’s I’m so sorry, I never meant to hurt you. I tried to call and send letters but I never got through, and Richie didn’t get my letters either, I really need to find out what’s going on on that end,” I shook myself. “But I swear I meant to keep in contact. You’re my best friend Eddie! I love you, the only reason I didn’t let you know I was here was because Rich and I were trying to figure...us out.” I explained.

“Promise?” Eddie sighed. I smiled and grabbed his hand.

“ _ Promise. _

_ Low _

_ When you're feeling low _

_ And you just don't know where to run to _

_ Broke _

_ If your heart's been broke _

_ And you feel like you're all alone _

_ If you need something to believe in _

_ If you're looking for a light to guide you home _

_ Just look inside _

_ You're lights shining brighter than you know _

_ You should know _

_ I'm never gonna let you down _

_ I'm always gonna build you up _

_ And when you're feeling lost _

_ I will always find you love _

_ I'm never gonna walk away _

_ I'm always gonna have your back _

_ And if nothing else you can always count on that _

_ When you need me _

_ I promise I will never let you down.” _

_ (Never Gonna Let You Down by Colbie Caillat) _

“Okay,” He smiled. “So, this thing calling you.”

“Don’t say thing. I think we  _ both  _ know who it is.” I sighed.

“But why? Why is he calling you? Just you?”

“I don’t know, Ed’s! I’m as lost as you are.” I banged my head on the back of my seat.

“Okay, well let’s think this through. Is there anything….I don’t know,  _ different _ about that summer. Did anything happen to only you?” He pried. 

“I-uhm, oh! Yes yes there was! I saw Georgie!” I shrieked.

“Quiet down!” He ducked, pulling me down too.

“Sorry,” I whispered. “It was after Neibolt, I was walking home and there he was! But obviously it wasn’t Georgie it was, well it, an- and he could read my mind? And I-I started running and it told me to come with him and I- I ran home and that was that.”

“But, we all had interactions like that.” Eddie reasoned.

“I guess, but I don’t know what else it could be.” I groaned.

“Oh! I know I know what it was!” He stage whispered.

“Care to tell the class?” 

“At Neibolt, you offered to make a deal! To go with him, maybe that has something to do with this.”

“But, didn’t Bill do that too?”

“Bill’s not in Derry.”

“Good point.” I sighed. “But, that doesn’t make sense! We killed It, how can it be calling me?”

“I don’t know.” Eddie groaned. “Well, whatever this is, just ignore it, yeah? Focus on us. Focus on me, mkay? And tell me when you hear it, I’ll help distract you.”

“Okay.” I sighed. “Thanks Ed’s. Hey...can this stay between you and me? I don’t know how the others would take it.”

“Sure, no problem.” He smiled, and then chuckled, his grin growing.

“What?” I asked, smiling too.

“I missed this.” He confessed. “I miss having secrets and joking and just being crazy together.” 

“Me too. Remember that time when we went to that sappy love movie and  _ begged  _ the manager there to burn any and all footage they had of it?” I chuckled at the memory.

“Oh my God they almost didn’t let us in again after you tried to sneak in the back and steal the reel.” He remembered.

“Wasn’t that the night we tried to write a love song?” I asked.

“Holy shit yes! What was it called-uh-never something?”

“ _ Never Ending Story!” _ I squealed.

“Do you remember it?” He asked excitedly.

“I think! Let’s try it ready? One, two,

_ Turn around _

_ Look at what you see _

_ In her face _

_ The mirror of your dream _

_ Make believe I'm everywhere _

_ Given in the light _

_ Written on the pages is _

_ The answer to our never ending story, ah _

_ Reach the stars _

_ Fly a fantasy _

_ Dream a dream _

_ And what you see will be _

_ Rhymes that keep their secrets will _

_ Unfold behind the clouds _

_ And there upon a rainbow is _

_ The answer to our never ending story, ah _

_ Story, ah.” _

_ (Never Ending Story from Stranger Things) _

“Wowza we did it!” I giggled.

“Oh my God, I can’t believe we remembered.” He grinned. “Uh-oh, suns coming up. We should probably get back.”

“Probably. Hey, Eds? After our campout, do you wanna have a sleepover?” I asked.

“I’d love nothing more.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I really missed Eddie/Jane friendship so I had to give them their own lil chapter


	17. Losers are Supposed to Stick Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jane reunites with the Losers

*Back to present time*

I smiled, albeit a little sadly, at that table we had sat at so many years ago. The longer I walked around, the more I realized how much I had missed the Losers. We used to do everything together, to the point where when we were apart I felt like I couldn’t breathe. They were the air in my lungs, the warm fuzzy feeling in my heart, my very soul. I skipped a little as I passed the terrible town, happy memories flashing through my mind. I paused, mid-skip, realizing I was nearing the temple that Stan attended and held his bar mitzvah celebration. 

*flashback*

*yes I changed it so it’s gonna be accurate but different to the first fic srry*

“Reflecting on the meaning of what I just read, the word ‘Leshanot’ comes up a lot, which means um, to change, to transform. Which makes sense, I guess, because, today I’m supposed to become a man. It’s funny though. Everyone, I think, has some memories they’re prouder of than others, right? And, maybe that’s why change is so scary. Cause the things we wish we could leave behind….the whispers we wish we could silence….the nightmares we most want to wake up from….the memories we wish we could change….the secrets we feel like we have to keep….are the hardest to walk away from. The good stuff? The pictures in our mind that fade away the fastest? Those pieces of you it feels the easiest to lose. Maybe I don’t want to forget. Maybe, i-i-if that’s what today is all about, forget it, right?” Stan looked down to his shoes, almost deep in thought. 

“Thank you Stan.” His father stated, reaching for the mic. 

“T-today I’m supposed to become a man-“ Stan continued, jerking away from his father's clutches. 

“But I don’t, I don’t feel any different. I-I-“ his mic cord ran out and he paused, looking at his father with a glare so intense I was impressed. 

“I know I’m a loser. And no matter what, I always fucking will be.” He stated firmly, and left the building. 

*flashback over*

I sighed softly, his strong voice still loud in my head. I couldn’t play around anymore. I  _ had  _ to find my token, and soon. I sighed, plopping down onto a nearby bench.

_ There has to be something, somewhere. _

_ But where? _

Something about the past bugged me, I could still feel that pull that voice used to give me.

_ Hmmm, what if I tried that? _

I stood, glancing around to see if anyone was watching. When the coast was clear, I closed my eyes and let myself wander. This token thing had to be important, Mike conveyed that pretty clearly. So, that meant it had to resonate with me, right? I let myself travel for about five minutes until I slammed right into a wall, so I decided to peek every five minutes to be sure...although I still got a bit banged up and stubbed my toes a few times. I sighed and pulled on my locket, confused, tired, and frustrated. 

_ Where even am I? _

I squinted at the sun, surrounded by trees and bushes. I shook my head and groaned. This pull thing was just leading me to noth-

*bump*

I quickly braced myself with my hands as my waist bumped into stone. I opened my eyes again and marveled at what I had been drawn to. It was the old well I had wished at so many years ago. I leaned over and looked down, surprised to see some water still in it. Curious, I pulled the bucket up to the top and looked inside to see if the water was clean. It wasn’t, instead a little green and murky, but to my surprise something shiny hinted out from the filth. Gingerly, I dipped my hand in and grabbed it, wiping it clean. 

_ No fucking way _

It was the coin I had used for my wish. 

_ My token.  _

I squealed in delight and raced to the library, tugging at my locket excitedly. 

“Mike! Mike I did it! I found my toke-“

I paused, horrified at the scene in front of me. A man lay on the ground, blood seeping from the axe in his head. Eddie was staring at him with a bloody bandage on his cheek, Mike’s arm was bloody and getting bandaged up by Bev and Ben, and Richie was sitting down facing away from me. 

“What the fuck happened?” I screamed. 

“I’ll explain. You keep bandaging.” Bev mumbled and pulled me aside. 

“I swear to God I leave for two minutes-”

“Henry Bowers attacked Eddie at the Inn, and then, um, attacked Mike here.” she explained.

“ ** _WHAT?!”_ ** I yelled, whipping my head over at Eddie.

“I’m fine before you yell okay we bandaged it up-”

“ ** _EDWARD KASPBRAK YOU GOT STABBED BY BOWERS AND DIDN’T FUCKING THINK TO CALL OR TEXT ME?!”_ ** I stomped over to him.

“And all of you too! Eddie gets attacked and  _ none _ of you thought to call me? Same with Mike I mean come on we’re a  _ group _ guys! All of us togeth-”

*ring*

*ring*

I looked over at Mike’s vibrating phone.

“Guys,” I whispered.

  
  
  


“Where’s Bill?”


	18. Let's Kill This Fucking Clown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers gather at Neibolt

Mike grabbed his phone and silenced it quickly. 

“Guy’s c’mon where’s Bill??” I asked again, louder this time.

“H-he left to find a kid at the fair-”

“ _ Shit!” _ Mike interrupted Beverly and ran to grab his phone again, dialing rapidly.

“Bill, we’re all at the library. Where you at?” Mike asked. I watched, rubbing Eddie’s arm soothingly. His face grew serious and he jumped up, walking a few feet away.

“No, no, no, no, no, just, just- Look, just come here to the library, we can talk about the plan-” he paused again, face growing more and more panicked. I began to clutch Eddie harder.

“No, no, no, no-Bill, Bill!” his voice rose until the steady beep of departure rang from his phone. Bill had hung up. Never a good sign.

“Mike?” I asked, unaware of my death grip on poor Eddie.

“He’s going to fight It alone.” Mike sighed.

“What?” Richie muttered.

_ “What???” _ I reiterated. 

“ _ Alone. _ It’s about the group! The ritual doesn’t work without  _ the group _ . Doing it together is why it’d work!” Mike ranted. He paused to snatch his weird tribal thing from Richie, giving him a glare. I squinted at Mike. That wasn’t a good sign either.

“Mike did he tell you where he was going?” Ben asked, ever the sane saint.

“If he really wanted to kill Pennywise, there’s only one place he’ll go.” Beverly realized.

“The same place the ritual needs to be performed.” Mike confirmed.

“Oh, we’re not gonna like this are we?” Eddie sighed.

“Shit.” I muttered.

“Fuck.” Ben mumbled.

“Alright, alright your word is worse you win.” I grumbled. Ben ushered us outside and we all clambered into the cars, Bev joining me in Mike’s.

“Jane?” she whispered as we sped off.

“Yeah?” I responded.

“Are you…..mad at me?” she mumbled, looking away. I sighed.

“No. I’m not mad I suppose. And I’m truly sorry for going off on you the way I did. I’m sure you were handling it the best you could. I just, I  _ loved _ Stan so much and- hearing him before he- it just  _ hurt  _ so much Bevvie.” I cried. 

“I know it’s not your fault, and I love you Bev of course I do. I was just, struggling. It’s not an excuse, I shouldn’t have said what I did. I’m sorry.” I responded. She threw her arm around my shoulder, like we used to as kids.

“I love you too. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you all sooner.” she kissed my cheek and we embraced each other.

  
  
  


Mike parked the car with ease, and we ran up to Neibolt where Bill had begun his journey inside.

“Bill!” Bev cried out as we grew closer.

“No! No you guys no! I s-s-s-started all this. I-it’s my fault that y-you’re all here. This curse, this fucking thing that’s inside you all. It started growing the day that I m-m-made you go down to the Barrens because all I cared about was finding G-g-g-georgie. Now I’m gonna g-o in there, and I don’t know what’s gonna happen, but I can’t ask you to do this it-” Bill paused as Bev stooped down and picked up a metal rod off the ground. 

“Well, we’re not asking you either.” she stated.

“Bev-”

“We didn’t do it alone then, Bill,” Mike interrupted him. “So we’re not gonna do this alone now.”

“It may have started with you, Bill. But it ended with all of us. Yes you tried to go after it for Georgie but, It attacked all of us too. None of that was because of you. We all had our reasons, our motives.” I added. “And now we’re using them as our reason to kill Pennywise too.”

“Losers stick together.” Ben agreed. I couldn’t help but tear up with admiration for my friends. Sure they were absolute dickheads and tried to ditch everything in the beginning but, when the time came they all stepped up to the plate.

“So, does somebody want to say something?” Eddie asked.

“Richie said it b-b-best when we were here last.” Bill reminded us.

“I did?” Richie asked. He paused in thought. “‘I don’t wanna die?’”

“Not that.” Bill shook his head. Richie paused again.

“‘You’re lucky we’re not measuring dicks?’”

“ _ Jesus Richie- _ ”

“No.” Bill sighed. 

“‘Let’s kill this fucking clown?’” He asked. I smiled along with Bill, the memory rooted inside me.

*flashback*

_ “I told you, Bill. I fucking told you. I don’t wanna die. It’s your fault.” Richie said.  _

_ “Richie…” my voice faltered.  _

** _How can he do this?!_ **

_ “You punched me in the face, made me walk through shitty water, you brought me to a fucking crackhead house!” Richie paced and counted on his fingers. Then he stopped.  _

_ “And now,” he said, pulling a bat out of the junk pile, “I’m gonna have to kill this fucking clown.” _

_ Richie. My heart soared.  _

_ The clown dropped Bill.  _

_ “WELCOME TO THE LOSERS CLUB, ASSHOLE!” _

*wdym why did she put that flashback in THAT WAS THE MOST BADASS THING EVER YOU BET I FLASHBACKED TO IT*

“Let’s kill this fucking clown.” Richie repeated, stronger and with confidence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOOOOO WE'RE GETTING TO THE ENDDDDD THERE'S ONLY AN HOUR ONE MINUTE AND TWENTY ONE SECONDS LEFFFTTTTTTT


	19. The Beginning of the End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers enter Neibolt

##  We entered slowly, and I gazed in disgust at my surroundings. Who knew a rotting corpse of a house could get worse than it already was twenty seven years ago? I paused. 

_ Who knew a rotting corpse of a house would still be  _ ** _standing_ ** _ twenty seven years later. _

“Hmm. Well I love what he’s done with the place.” Richie joked as black goop sizzled down the stairs.

“Beep beep Richie.” Bev replied.

“Alright.”

We spread out, searching the old house. Ben headed into one room, Beverly and Mike heading down the hall. I chose to follow Bill, Richie, and Eddie instead.

“Hey, hey that’s the basement, right?” Bill asked, speed-walking to a door opened a tad. Just as he neared it Ben started gasping and we all froze, snapping our heads to the sound.

“Ben?!” I heard Bev yell. The door behind us closed and Bill and I raced to it, slamming our hands on it in protest.

“No, no.” Eddie mumbled as he joined us.

“Ben?!” We hollered from our seclusion. No response. 

*Clang!*

Eddie, Bill and I slowly turned to the little fridge standing against the wall. Richie moved in front, a terrible idea really. Clearly he did not remember Eddie’s and my fiasco that occured the first time we were here. The fridge rattled and shook, growing louder. I reached my hand over to Richie’s arm, a feeble attempt to pull him over.

“Okay, that can’t be good right?” Richie mumbled.

“Based off of last time? Nope definitely not.” I whimpered. The shaking turned to pounding and the door opened ever so eerily to us. Though the light inside flickered, there was no mistaking the jumbled up mass of limbs stuffed inside. I gulped at the soft, curly brown hair as the head of the boy lifted up, stiff bones cracking and popping. 

“It’s Stan.” Richie stated. 

It was silent for a few seconds, save the screaming coming from Ben, Bev and Mike in the other room, and I stood in a silent panic. Then the yelling started. ‘Stan’ began shrieking, which in turn made Richie shriek, and the domino effect made its way down until all of us were blended in the world’s most unnerving harmony. Then ‘Stan’s’ head  _ fell off his neck and rolled to Richie. _

Bill and I yelped and slammed against the door, poor Eddie mumbled a small ‘oh God’ and Richie managed to hop over the head with a ‘shit’ and backed away. The head was then stopped by a piece of rubbish and settled, ‘Stan’s’ dead, cloudy eyes focused on us. Eddie began hyperventilating, in desperate need of his inhaler.

“I’d still be alive if it wasn’t for you, Bill.” ‘Stan’s’ young voice spoke.

“No,” Bill whimpered, slowly approaching it. The head twitched, and a revolting cracking sound could be heard from within it.

“Richie? What’s happening to me?” ‘Stan’ asked, terrified as lumps pushed at the skin around his head. Richie shrugged, face twisted in fear. ‘Stan’ whimpered as bony, slimy, spider-like legs pushed out of him, lifting the head up with ease.

“You gotta be fucking kidding.” Richie said. ‘Stan’ laughed maniacally, then charged at an unprepared Richie. 

“Fuck!” he yelled, running away from the razor-toothed head. The head switched courses and headed to Eddie instead, chomping away. Eddie moaned and kicked it away. I pulled him to my side of the room.

“Oh Goddammit get it away from me, oh God!” he shrieked. The head then chased Bill, unearthly noises escaping its mouth as Bill slammed it through a window and into another room. He panted and stood, looking in the window to find it, but it had retreated with an unmistakable clown laugh. I turned to Eddie and searched his pockets for his inhaler.

“Eddie, hey are you okay?” Richie asked softly, heading over.

“I’m-” Eddie stopped as a long, slimy piece of drool dropped down from the ceiling like a spider on a string of web. Richie followed it up and sure enough, there was the demonic thing grinning in the rafters.

“Oh, there he is.” Richie stated. The head dropped onto him and gripped his face, pushing him to the ground and trying its best to clamp onto him. He screamed and Bill and I raced to him, gripping the head and pulling with all our might.

“Get it off of me!” Richie yelled. 

“We’re trying!” I grunted, pulling its hair tightly. The others began to bang on the door outside, screaming Richie’s name.

“Get it off of me!” Richie repeated.

“I wanna go home.” Eddie mumbled from his corner.

“G-get the knife! Goddammit Eddie get the knife!” Bill screamed.

“Bill get it off of me, Bill! Quick!” Richie shouted.

“Eddie please!” I cried, tears blurring my vision as I switched to punching the head in an effort to daze him.

“Eddie get the knife!” Bill ordered again. The head pushed harder, getting inches away from Richie’s face.

“Eddie please please for the love of God grab the knife! I need you to be brave Ed’s _ please _ I can’t lose him too.” I sobbed, pulling on the head as hard as I could.

“AHH FUCK!” Richie screamed. Then, Ben raced in through the window and stabbed the head clear through with Bev’s rod. It groaned and crackled, so Ben repeated the action several more times. Blood floated up to the ceiling and the head loosened its grip. Bill pulled it off and tossed it to the wall as Bev and Mike rushed in too. I quickly wiped Richie’s face with the end of my shirt and pulled him up, holding his face gently.

“Are you okay? Richie baby please are you okay? Talk to me, c’mon honey breathe.” I sniffed as he gasped for air.

“Is everyone okay?” Bev asked, joining me on the ground with Richie. 

“You alright?” Bill asked too. Richie gave him a small nod, and Bill stood and sped to Eddie, shoving him against the wall.

“He could have f-f-fucking died man! You k-k-know that right?” Bill yelled.

“I can’t see.” Richie wheezed. I bolted up and started searching for his glasses. Bev handed them to me and I placed them on him carefully.

“Georgie’s dead. T-the kid’s dead. Stan-Stanley’s dead. You-you want R-Richie too? YOU WANT RICHIE TOO?” Bill screamed as Mike tried to pry him off gently.

“I don’t want Richie, too, I don’t, I don’t.” Eddie whimpered. “Please don’t be mad Bill. I was just scared.” Eddie cried, sniffling.

“Yeah. That’s what he w-w-wants right? D-don’t give it to him.” Bill softened and backed away. Eddie nodded, wiping his tears away. I sniffed too, opening my arms up. Eddie sobbed and fell down to me, hugging me as we cried together.

“Pennywise is fucking scary I’ll give you that. But, living life knowing I’m not gonna see you guys again is so much worse Eds. We have to stick together if we’re gonna beat this thing yeah?” I reminded him. He nodded and I pulled his inhaler from his jacket pocket, handing it to him.


	20. In the Beneath to Find Belief

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Losers head into the sewers

We headed down the stairs slowly, the uneasy feeling settling deep within us.

“A lot of memories, huh?” Ben spoke gravely. “All bad.”

We inched forward, towards the dusty, bloody, old well. Mike climbed down first, then Bill, Richie, Eddie, Me, Bev and Ben bringing up the rear. I groaned as my head scratched the top of the sewer tunnel. 

“I miss when these tunnels were smaller.” I complained.

“What the fuck are talking about, you’ve grown like two inches since we’ve been here.” Richie responded. 

“Shut up guys.” Eddie reprimanded. The soft splashes of those ahead reaching the water uplifted me, and I tapped on the wall impatiently, anxious to get more room.

“Oh, man. Blech. Greywater.” Eddie gagged. I made a face and carefully stepped in the cold water, trying not to think about what exactly I was stepping on. We treaded carefully through the sewers, Mike leading us through the familiar labyrinth. The deeper in we traveled, the higher the water rose. Eventually the water soaked us halfway up, and we approached the cistern slowly. It was so different from what it used to be, the pile of children, items, and junk gone and replaced with a platform on a rock. Soft blue-green light flickered on my eyes from the opening at the top.

“Shit, this is it.” Ben murmured. “This is where it happened.”

We continued in our line and made our way through the chilling water, now up to our chests, though the water seemed warmer than the room itself.

“No, no, no, no, no ugh!” Eddie raised his arms and dodged a small teddy bear floating near us. I watched it pass by, slowing to a stop. 

*flashback*

“ _ Jane come on! We have to go!” _

_ “But dad! Betty’s bear, she needs it!” _

_ “There’s no time Jane, we can just buy her a new one.” _

_ “But dad, mom gave her that bear!” _

_ “And your new mother can give her another. We’re leaving  _ ** _now _ ** _ Jane c’mon!” _

*flashback over*

“Jane? You okay?” Bev asked quietly. I jolted and nodded, hurrying to catch up with Ed’s. He climbed up the platform and lended me his hand, which I took gratefully. 

“Bev? What is it?” Ben whispered. All of us turned to see Bev facing the exit. She swiveled to us. 

“I thought I heard something.” she explained sheepishly. My eyes widened in fear as a giant,  _ thing _ rose out of the water and grabbed her, pulling her down.

“Time to sink!” It cackled, pulling her underwater. I screamed, shocked as the gang all dived in. Reluctantly I dove too, albeit slower. I didn’t wanna get in the way, so I did my best to avoid the others and search for Bev instead. Which was  _ extremely _ hard seeing as it was fucking murky black water and my eyes were closed. I reached out blindly and prayed I’d feel her hand or foot or something. The air in my lungs burned and threatened to escape, but I could hear swishing near me so I refused to exit. Luck was on my side, for in my search I managed to grab an arm. I pulled it up along with the others, and together we rose, Beverly safe in our arms. She sobbed in Bill’s arms, and I gasped and sputtered.

“I feel like crying.” Eddie said, on the verge of tears.

“Mike, where do we go from here?” Richie asked, squeezing my arm. I frowned slightly, looking down where my arm was looped with Richie’s. I didn’t remember doing that. Mike began to climb the rock again, so together Richie and I followed, picking up Eddie along the way. When we reached the top Mike had us all gather around a trap door on the floor with a curious sign on it, I couldn’t make out what it was.

“In the depths is where It crept, in the beneath to find belief. In the depths is where It crept, in the beneath to find belief.” Mike repeated to himself.

“Is he okay?” Ben asked.

“I think at this point that’s a relative question.” Richie responded.

“What’s on the other side?” Beverly questioned fearfully.

“I don’t know. No one does.” Mike answered honestly, before leaning down and opening the hatch. 


End file.
